Baseball is over for us. First time since Andrew was six that we aren't playing baseball in August. Not sure what we will do with all our time but Andrew seems ok with it all, and not having to wash uniforms every single day is nice too.
I have to mention the new book I am almost finished reading. It's really a teenager's book but Pam recommended it. It's called Twilight and is about teenaged vampires. It is very intriguing....I can see why teens love the love story --but it certainly isn't what I would normally read. But I must admit I really like it! I even googled it as there is a movie coming out in December. I was curious to see who was playing the parts...the female lead is exactly like I imagined, while the male lead is a bit too creepy for my imagination, but I am sure I will go see it anyway. Not anything that I would have ever picked for myself that is for sure. But if you are open minded, try it!
Today is "get yourself a nipple day". And "goodbye Mr. Pizza Pocket day". Haven't thought much about it to tell you the truth.
I will post later to let you know how it goes. My surgery starts at 2:30 in Kalamazoo. I am glad i get to drink and eat prior! : )
More later.
Molly
Friday, July 18, 2008
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
I can be an idiot.
How can you all stand me?
This morning, I took Dan and Andrew to their game at Hope College--had to leave at 7:30. Got home around 1:00 (we won) to see that there was again NOTHING in the mail about my test results. So I check caller ID and sure enough, Dr. T had called. I didn't right away panic as Andrew has his physical tomorrow so I hoped they just left a message reminding...well, no, no message. Heart starts beating, hands shaking. Strangely, I also saw that they had called at 9:16 a.m. and a year ago Thursday, Dr. H called at 9:46 to tell me I had cancer.
Body shaking, I called and got put on hold for hours (ok, two minutes). The receptionist came back on and when I told her I hadn't gotten my results back she said "oh, it takes at least a week." And then she said, "While I have you on the phone, I called this morning about Andrew's appointment so he he still on? (yes) "And let me see if by chance we do have your results just in case."
On hold.
Yup, the letter went out and everything is normal.
Why do I do this to myself???? I PROMISED myself that I wouldn't worry so much. I wasn't worried all morning until I saw that the office had called.
Anywhooo, so that is all good. Andrew's team won, 8-0, and we play again at 5:30 tonight. Andrew is electing to go to football instead and I don't blame him as his coach only plays him if the Lakeshore kids are missing (which is understandable, as the Lakeshore kids are very good). This team is VERY good but we are just beginning to see some really good teams. Hope College is beautiful by the way. Their baseball stadium is brand new and is a great place to watch a game. In fact, Jim and I will probably go back up for the second game. He is a coach (who isn't needed all that much) but I would love for him to see the field and the campus.
Josh is off to driver's ed. Poor thing just turned 16 but we neglected to get his permit in time last summer when I was diagnosed so he can't get his license until first week of September. He says he is absolutely fine with it and seems so.
Aloha,
Mollykelani
This morning, I took Dan and Andrew to their game at Hope College--had to leave at 7:30. Got home around 1:00 (we won) to see that there was again NOTHING in the mail about my test results. So I check caller ID and sure enough, Dr. T had called. I didn't right away panic as Andrew has his physical tomorrow so I hoped they just left a message reminding...well, no, no message. Heart starts beating, hands shaking. Strangely, I also saw that they had called at 9:16 a.m. and a year ago Thursday, Dr. H called at 9:46 to tell me I had cancer.
Body shaking, I called and got put on hold for hours (ok, two minutes). The receptionist came back on and when I told her I hadn't gotten my results back she said "oh, it takes at least a week." And then she said, "While I have you on the phone, I called this morning about Andrew's appointment so he he still on? (yes) "And let me see if by chance we do have your results just in case."
On hold.
Yup, the letter went out and everything is normal.
Why do I do this to myself???? I PROMISED myself that I wouldn't worry so much. I wasn't worried all morning until I saw that the office had called.
Anywhooo, so that is all good. Andrew's team won, 8-0, and we play again at 5:30 tonight. Andrew is electing to go to football instead and I don't blame him as his coach only plays him if the Lakeshore kids are missing (which is understandable, as the Lakeshore kids are very good). This team is VERY good but we are just beginning to see some really good teams. Hope College is beautiful by the way. Their baseball stadium is brand new and is a great place to watch a game. In fact, Jim and I will probably go back up for the second game. He is a coach (who isn't needed all that much) but I would love for him to see the field and the campus.
Josh is off to driver's ed. Poor thing just turned 16 but we neglected to get his permit in time last summer when I was diagnosed so he can't get his license until first week of September. He says he is absolutely fine with it and seems so.
Aloha,
Mollykelani
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
I hate this week.
I know what you are going to say, but I just don't want to.
Yup, no pap results yet in the mail. Doctor said he would hope to get a letter in the mail to me by the end of LAST week. I had told him I wanted nothing but "normal" results. I know I should call--and I will after tomorrow--because Andrew has a physical on Thursday anyway. But dang, what does it mean? I googled pap test results to see if there was something that would indicate that abnormal tests took longer to discern (my breast biopsy went longer-- to use different stains to see what was happening) but I found nothing that said that, EXCEPT that it said pap results can take up to three weeks. Well, I happen to know that NORMAL results don't take that long --I've always had normal results--and it seemed like it took a week or so. Heavy sigh.
I then googled ACC of the cervix and that was enough to put me over the edge. But there wasn't much to suggest it was anything but a primary site, so I guess that is good. ACC is an awful cancer.
Speaking of that, Prudence, also known as Pru, passed away this weekend. Pru was the moderator of the ACC website that I found and have used almost daily throughout my journey. She had ACC salivary gland with mets to the brain being what ended up killing her. We are all so sad. I giggle thinking about her because she had a lot of rules for using the site--very SMART rules I would guess--she didn't like any of us just posting to say thank you, or good luck on your tests, that type of thing. She wanted it all factual, question based, and answered based. A few times I felt like I got in trouble when I would post and she would answer but gosh, she was a fountain of knowledge and moderated the ACC site without compensation for many years. She will be so missed and when I participate in Relay for Life soon I will be thinking of all she has done for us fledgling ACC newbies out here. I was so sad last night for a woman I never met.
Jamie Z, thanks for your comments. We both need to go out and get drunk and cry. : ) But we won't--we will be responsible and suck it up and get up, each day. That is our only option. We have lots to do in this world still and people need us.
This is the same week I was waiting for my results of my breast biopsy last year. I had it done on Monday and found out Thursday morning. No wonder I am a mess.
Wow, this is a pretty downer blog. I do have a funny story from camping--at least I think it is funny. Camping the first night was really hot that we even had a fan running outside. Well, the fan went into the tent that two kids were sleeping in and in the morning, the kids found a three legged frog in the fan's box. Outside the box was the fourth leg.
That just made me crack up.
Time to go tackle the world and try not to puke from nerves. I am about to swear off all tests, I really mean it. But then I am not sure my docs would give me drugs and lord knows, i need those. (I am really just kidding about the drugs...I do have my bottle of Xanax and may have to take one today, but in general, I am ok without them)
Love, love, love--
Molly
Yup, no pap results yet in the mail. Doctor said he would hope to get a letter in the mail to me by the end of LAST week. I had told him I wanted nothing but "normal" results. I know I should call--and I will after tomorrow--because Andrew has a physical on Thursday anyway. But dang, what does it mean? I googled pap test results to see if there was something that would indicate that abnormal tests took longer to discern (my breast biopsy went longer-- to use different stains to see what was happening) but I found nothing that said that, EXCEPT that it said pap results can take up to three weeks. Well, I happen to know that NORMAL results don't take that long --I've always had normal results--and it seemed like it took a week or so. Heavy sigh.
I then googled ACC of the cervix and that was enough to put me over the edge. But there wasn't much to suggest it was anything but a primary site, so I guess that is good. ACC is an awful cancer.
Speaking of that, Prudence, also known as Pru, passed away this weekend. Pru was the moderator of the ACC website that I found and have used almost daily throughout my journey. She had ACC salivary gland with mets to the brain being what ended up killing her. We are all so sad. I giggle thinking about her because she had a lot of rules for using the site--very SMART rules I would guess--she didn't like any of us just posting to say thank you, or good luck on your tests, that type of thing. She wanted it all factual, question based, and answered based. A few times I felt like I got in trouble when I would post and she would answer but gosh, she was a fountain of knowledge and moderated the ACC site without compensation for many years. She will be so missed and when I participate in Relay for Life soon I will be thinking of all she has done for us fledgling ACC newbies out here. I was so sad last night for a woman I never met.
Jamie Z, thanks for your comments. We both need to go out and get drunk and cry. : ) But we won't--we will be responsible and suck it up and get up, each day. That is our only option. We have lots to do in this world still and people need us.
This is the same week I was waiting for my results of my breast biopsy last year. I had it done on Monday and found out Thursday morning. No wonder I am a mess.
Wow, this is a pretty downer blog. I do have a funny story from camping--at least I think it is funny. Camping the first night was really hot that we even had a fan running outside. Well, the fan went into the tent that two kids were sleeping in and in the morning, the kids found a three legged frog in the fan's box. Outside the box was the fourth leg.
That just made me crack up.
Time to go tackle the world and try not to puke from nerves. I am about to swear off all tests, I really mean it. But then I am not sure my docs would give me drugs and lord knows, i need those. (I am really just kidding about the drugs...I do have my bottle of Xanax and may have to take one today, but in general, I am ok without them)
Love, love, love--
Molly
Monday, July 14, 2008
Ava's blood drive
Monday morning and what a sunny, warm day. Days like this should be bottled and sold.
Camping was fun as always. We arrived Friday night and set up, and later had hotdogs and fried walleye. I bought Jim a new deep fryer and he was loving it. He beer battered the fish--I avoided it--but my hot dogs over the fire were wonderful. The Hollands et.al had pizza over the open fire and that was quite good too. I also made strawberry shortcake. During the night the rains came and everything was SOAKED. We just let the kids sleep in and cooked under the awning. We had biscuits and gravy for breakfast and although the weather report said rain until 5:00 that evening, it actually stopped around noon and ended up being a glorious, cool breezy day. Jim was wanting BLTS for lunch so I started frying bacon early, and it was taking forever on our little propane stove, so Jim decided to deep fry it. Get this--it was fabulous! I thought it sounded horrible, but it went so fast and was a lot less greasy than mine. We will cook it that way from now on--when we need to cook a lot that is. ( we also cooked some for Sundy's breakfast, which was bagel/eggs/bacon sammies.) Saturday night we all had shish kabobs that were great as well. Nothing like cooking over open fire. We also had the proverbial s'mores, and Dave Holland made yummy homemade strawberry ice cream. We got home Sunday afternoon and slept well last night, but Jim and I have decided sleeping in our camper isn't half bad because the AC keeps it so cool. Love it.
Still haven't gotten my test results from Dr. T yet...I think the mail is here but I literally can't get out the front door as the doorknob broke off last night when I was locking up. I need to fix that soon!
Josh was such a big help yesterday with tearing down the camper that I promised him lunch today at his choice. As of last night, he chose Olive Garden. Andrew was in charge of the dog but didn't so much, but I will allow him to come to OG if he wants. : )
I have decided I have too much time on my hands and this makes me worry about cancer. Never would I think i would want to go back to work, but I'm getting there. I just love sleeping in so much.
Oh! I almost forgot to mention this. Jamie and Jamie Zimmerman are sponsoring a memorial blood drive in honor of Ava Christine. The drive is July 29 from 2:00 pm until 8:30 pm at the Niles Inn here in Niles. I can't give blood because of my cancer but certainly would if I could. If you want an appointment, call Jamie at 269-695-1476 but walk ins are welcomed. If you have never given blood it is really easy and painless. I used to give blood all the time and was about to start giving again but read that cancer survivors can't give blood until they are cancer free for five years. I am not sure I would even give then, since my cancer can lay dormant for so long, but we will see. But if yougive, you will feel so good about it, it will honor Ava, and most importantly, you could be helping someone in a time of need. Please take the time to do this.
Don't forget to cop a feel with yourself tonight if you haven't lately. If you feel anything weird, call your doctor.
Much amore,
Molly
Camping was fun as always. We arrived Friday night and set up, and later had hotdogs and fried walleye. I bought Jim a new deep fryer and he was loving it. He beer battered the fish--I avoided it--but my hot dogs over the fire were wonderful. The Hollands et.al had pizza over the open fire and that was quite good too. I also made strawberry shortcake. During the night the rains came and everything was SOAKED. We just let the kids sleep in and cooked under the awning. We had biscuits and gravy for breakfast and although the weather report said rain until 5:00 that evening, it actually stopped around noon and ended up being a glorious, cool breezy day. Jim was wanting BLTS for lunch so I started frying bacon early, and it was taking forever on our little propane stove, so Jim decided to deep fry it. Get this--it was fabulous! I thought it sounded horrible, but it went so fast and was a lot less greasy than mine. We will cook it that way from now on--when we need to cook a lot that is. ( we also cooked some for Sundy's breakfast, which was bagel/eggs/bacon sammies.) Saturday night we all had shish kabobs that were great as well. Nothing like cooking over open fire. We also had the proverbial s'mores, and Dave Holland made yummy homemade strawberry ice cream. We got home Sunday afternoon and slept well last night, but Jim and I have decided sleeping in our camper isn't half bad because the AC keeps it so cool. Love it.
Still haven't gotten my test results from Dr. T yet...I think the mail is here but I literally can't get out the front door as the doorknob broke off last night when I was locking up. I need to fix that soon!
Josh was such a big help yesterday with tearing down the camper that I promised him lunch today at his choice. As of last night, he chose Olive Garden. Andrew was in charge of the dog but didn't so much, but I will allow him to come to OG if he wants. : )
I have decided I have too much time on my hands and this makes me worry about cancer. Never would I think i would want to go back to work, but I'm getting there. I just love sleeping in so much.
Oh! I almost forgot to mention this. Jamie and Jamie Zimmerman are sponsoring a memorial blood drive in honor of Ava Christine. The drive is July 29 from 2:00 pm until 8:30 pm at the Niles Inn here in Niles. I can't give blood because of my cancer but certainly would if I could. If you want an appointment, call Jamie at 269-695-1476 but walk ins are welcomed. If you have never given blood it is really easy and painless. I used to give blood all the time and was about to start giving again but read that cancer survivors can't give blood until they are cancer free for five years. I am not sure I would even give then, since my cancer can lay dormant for so long, but we will see. But if yougive, you will feel so good about it, it will honor Ava, and most importantly, you could be helping someone in a time of need. Please take the time to do this.
Don't forget to cop a feel with yourself tonight if you haven't lately. If you feel anything weird, call your doctor.
Much amore,
Molly
Friday, July 11, 2008
The lonely disease.
I wasn't going to blog today but got on to check the weather report and saw my Kristina's comment.
THIS is how cancer kills people. Kristina, you put into words exactly what every test, every exam, every probe, every ache and pain, does to us. It is just the worst. I am so thankful that nothing showed up for you...and thankful they were diligent for you...but totally understand what you are thinking and feeling. Still not having my pap results back, I freak when the phone rings. It's all too much.
BUT, thank heavens for Xanax I guess. I am just sick for what you went through and understand why you don't want any more tests. I know all cancer survivors go through this is some ways, but with ACC, IF it shows up again, we have no options and bascially, while we may live for a few years, mayabe as much as even 10-20, getting ACC again is what will kill us. I don't mean to be a downer to anyone but I want to put into writing why this cancer is so bad. We all look fine, and even feel fine, but it's still there, that awful possibility. I think this piece by Alice Neely that I found late at night one night is very good to explain how this weighs on us. The scary thing is I have no idea how Alice is doing, so I don't even think about it.
However, to spin this in a positive way, because it is the only way to win, Kristina and I have ACC/breast (although I worry I have it in my neck) and we hope that the prognosis for this cancer is better than normal... We have to believe this Kristina and we have to tell ourselves "we are not going to die today." And then we have to live.
I want to cry for Kristina's experience because I feel it deep in my heart--been there--but instead, I will get going, get packing for camping, curse the weather report, and pet my dog.
And if that doesn't work, I will take another Xanax and live stoned. Those 70's people may have been on to something.
Molly
THIS is how cancer kills people. Kristina, you put into words exactly what every test, every exam, every probe, every ache and pain, does to us. It is just the worst. I am so thankful that nothing showed up for you...and thankful they were diligent for you...but totally understand what you are thinking and feeling. Still not having my pap results back, I freak when the phone rings. It's all too much.
BUT, thank heavens for Xanax I guess. I am just sick for what you went through and understand why you don't want any more tests. I know all cancer survivors go through this is some ways, but with ACC, IF it shows up again, we have no options and bascially, while we may live for a few years, mayabe as much as even 10-20, getting ACC again is what will kill us. I don't mean to be a downer to anyone but I want to put into writing why this cancer is so bad. We all look fine, and even feel fine, but it's still there, that awful possibility. I think this piece by Alice Neely that I found late at night one night is very good to explain how this weighs on us. The scary thing is I have no idea how Alice is doing, so I don't even think about it.
A Lonely Disease
By: Alice Neely
What's scary about ACC is that there's really no one to talk to. Doctors either brush you off or send you home to make your will, your family gets terrified every time you reveal a new pain so you start staying quiet, and no one else in the world understands a cancer that can linger for years and haunt you and terrify you. The public is used to a dramatic diagnosis followed by surgery, chemo baldness and usually death in 2-3 years. We with ACC linger on and on, year after year. People get tired of hearing about our aches, pains and limitations. They lost that initial surge of sympathy they had years ago when we were first diagnosed. Most cancer patients would be gone by now but we linger on. Getting new tests and new evidence of mets.
And even then we don't get really sick. Our doctors say wait, nothing we can do, enjoy your life. We go back to living, trying, working, having relationships. But still it haunts us. WE know it is a killer. We know there isn't a good cure. We know our lung mets are now legion instead of 3. But the others who know us are tired of our dramas. Like the boy that cried wolf they've stopped believing in the urgency, they want to enjoy their healthy lives and they're tired of hearing about ours. Our brave lives of living in the face of fear and met knowledge. People get excited but then look for resolution, life goes on, their lives go on. Ours are a continuing drama of new test results, new pains and new trials. I think we just wear them out.
So who can we talk to? Our doctors nod with smiles and leave the room, our families get terrified so much so we have to calm them and our friends don't understand our fears. We look too damn good.
Of course it colors everything we do and feel; relationships, children, jobs, everything. None of them can know how influenced we are by knowing we have ACC. We live with it, we don't like it, but we're thankful we don't have something more deadly and rapid. We're the lucky cancer ones, so who are we to complain? We live years with ours when other are gone in a year. So what is our beef?!
We are alone, no one understands, no one can relate. How many times have all of us heard "Over 5 years ago? Well, that's good news! After 5 years cancer doesn't come back!" Well, that's with normal cancer, we say, ours is different and the longer you go, the greater the chance of mets. It's just a matter of time. They laugh and say "Oh, you're just worried. Think positive!" We do, we try, we think bloody positive every bloody day, year after year. But the mets keep coming and they keep growing and we keep getting more scared. So, who can we talk to?
Our thoughts only scare others. It’s just really not fair.
Alice Neely
diag. 1990, ACC salivary gland, 1993 neck resection, 39 weeks radiation
lung mets 2004, lymph mets 2005
Member of ACCOI’s free email Information Group: http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/Adenoid_Cystic_Carcinoma_Organization/
However, to spin this in a positive way, because it is the only way to win, Kristina and I have ACC/breast (although I worry I have it in my neck) and we hope that the prognosis for this cancer is better than normal... We have to believe this Kristina and we have to tell ourselves "we are not going to die today." And then we have to live.
I want to cry for Kristina's experience because I feel it deep in my heart--been there--but instead, I will get going, get packing for camping, curse the weather report, and pet my dog.
And if that doesn't work, I will take another Xanax and live stoned. Those 70's people may have been on to something.
Molly
Thursday, July 10, 2008
Not so blucky, just a bit yucky.
I am such a boob for complaining about all my ailments all of the time. Stomach is somewhat better today...I certainly can't say appetite was affected at all today as I had a work/lunch meeting and ate all that Reuben sandwich they gave me. It's just that bluckiness that is hard to shake. But I am definitely BETTER, just not perfect yet. Plus my usual ear/throat pain, and pain in my side/liver are still weighing in on all my emotions.
The other night I had a major hankering for homemade lemonade. I did not feel good and when I don't feel well I crave only certain things--usually, tomato juice is the key. (I think that is back from my college days when tomato juice and V8 were the cure for a night of drinking) Anyway, I almost got up and drove to Martin's to get some lemons. Finally, just yesterday I made some, following a recipe I got off the internet. (food network I am sure)
I must say, using the process I used, homemade lemonade is overrated! Of course, I don't have a juicer so I spent about a 1/2 hours squeezing lemons with my hands and getting stickiness all over my counter. I needed a whole cup of lemon juice and that took 6 lemons. Then I made the simple syrup that was recommended (sugar and water heated to dissolve the sugar) and added a few more cups of water (4 to be exact) And yes, it WAS good, but not necessarily worth the time I spent "juicing", not to mention the 6 lemons were almost 60 cents a piece. But there you go, I made it and can say I did.
A few minutes ago this thought crossed my mind: cancer has robbed me of dreaming but reminds me to live each day. I think I need to accept that. When I worry it is about something not happening yet, so I have to live by my mantra "I am not going to die today." I guess I needed to write this to remind myself to follow it. What a wonderful downer I can be.
Must go get husband's baseball uni and yell at Andrew to get himself dressed. We have to be in Kalamazoo at 4:30. It looks quite ominous outside but I am sure we will still have to go up there.
I probably won't blog until after camping, so I hope you all have a great weekend. I am sure I will be abused by my family as we sit around the campfire with umbrellas and a crazed dog--we are supposed to get thunderstorms on Saturday, but WE ARE STILL GOING DAMMIT!!!!
Psycho Camper Mom
The other night I had a major hankering for homemade lemonade. I did not feel good and when I don't feel well I crave only certain things--usually, tomato juice is the key. (I think that is back from my college days when tomato juice and V8 were the cure for a night of drinking) Anyway, I almost got up and drove to Martin's to get some lemons. Finally, just yesterday I made some, following a recipe I got off the internet. (food network I am sure)
I must say, using the process I used, homemade lemonade is overrated! Of course, I don't have a juicer so I spent about a 1/2 hours squeezing lemons with my hands and getting stickiness all over my counter. I needed a whole cup of lemon juice and that took 6 lemons. Then I made the simple syrup that was recommended (sugar and water heated to dissolve the sugar) and added a few more cups of water (4 to be exact) And yes, it WAS good, but not necessarily worth the time I spent "juicing", not to mention the 6 lemons were almost 60 cents a piece. But there you go, I made it and can say I did.
A few minutes ago this thought crossed my mind: cancer has robbed me of dreaming but reminds me to live each day. I think I need to accept that. When I worry it is about something not happening yet, so I have to live by my mantra "I am not going to die today." I guess I needed to write this to remind myself to follow it. What a wonderful downer I can be.
Must go get husband's baseball uni and yell at Andrew to get himself dressed. We have to be in Kalamazoo at 4:30. It looks quite ominous outside but I am sure we will still have to go up there.
I probably won't blog until after camping, so I hope you all have a great weekend. I am sure I will be abused by my family as we sit around the campfire with umbrellas and a crazed dog--we are supposed to get thunderstorms on Saturday, but WE ARE STILL GOING DAMMIT!!!!
Psycho Camper Mom
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
Bluck.
I don't feel good. It feels like the touch of the stomach flu, and if I knew it was that, I would just suck it up, but when you have had cancer, well, you know the drill........gawd.
I am thinking about digging through Drug Central (my medicine cabinet) to look for some anti-nausea meds. I got some a few summers ago when I experienced "labrynthitis", which I am sure most of you have never heard of...leave it moi to get it. (it's like vertigo) Anyway, I have so many unused pills in my medicine cabinet, I really should get rid of them. (I read today that you are not supposed to flush them, but instead ground them up and put them in coffee grounds and then seal them in a plastic bag to throw out. The coffee grounds prevent "accidental ingestion.")
Ugh. I can't shake this!
I am now back reading my rare cancer forum and there have been at least 2 more ACC/breast patients diagnosed--Didi and DarcyDiane. We all feel so lost because we are so rare. Kristina is still out there in internet land and I think is coming up on a 6 month chest xray--lots of positive thoughts and prayers her way please!
Still waiting for results on my pap...I am in telephonophobia--every time the phone rings I freak that it my doctor calling to say they found cancer. I've NEVER been afraid of these results but every test puts me over the edge.
My mom has two more chemo treatments left and she will then be done. She's doing fine, but has lost 30 pounds. The good thing is her blood pressure is very good now--the doctor took her off meds for that so she is happy.
Well, maybe I will take some things out to our trailer--we are going camping this weekend as I may have mentioned. I cleaned it this mornings and need to take the clean linens. It will be one less thing I have to do on Friday.
Yours truly in hypochondria,
Molly
I am thinking about digging through Drug Central (my medicine cabinet) to look for some anti-nausea meds. I got some a few summers ago when I experienced "labrynthitis", which I am sure most of you have never heard of...leave it moi to get it. (it's like vertigo) Anyway, I have so many unused pills in my medicine cabinet, I really should get rid of them. (I read today that you are not supposed to flush them, but instead ground them up and put them in coffee grounds and then seal them in a plastic bag to throw out. The coffee grounds prevent "accidental ingestion.")
Ugh. I can't shake this!
I am now back reading my rare cancer forum and there have been at least 2 more ACC/breast patients diagnosed--Didi and DarcyDiane. We all feel so lost because we are so rare. Kristina is still out there in internet land and I think is coming up on a 6 month chest xray--lots of positive thoughts and prayers her way please!
Still waiting for results on my pap...I am in telephonophobia--every time the phone rings I freak that it my doctor calling to say they found cancer. I've NEVER been afraid of these results but every test puts me over the edge.
My mom has two more chemo treatments left and she will then be done. She's doing fine, but has lost 30 pounds. The good thing is her blood pressure is very good now--the doctor took her off meds for that so she is happy.
Well, maybe I will take some things out to our trailer--we are going camping this weekend as I may have mentioned. I cleaned it this mornings and need to take the clean linens. It will be one less thing I have to do on Friday.
Yours truly in hypochondria,
Molly
Monday, July 7, 2008
It's hot out there.
Hello. I had a pap and a pelvic today so that shows you want a wonderful day it is. HA! My doc tried to even things out by telling me about prostate exams, but there still has to be a better way. I told him I expected nothing but "normal" on my report. My inner gut tells me it will be abnormal just because that is the way things seem to go for me. Drat.
TMI, I know. Just wanted to set the stage for my mood.
Actually, now that it is over, I feel somewhat relieved of course. My blood pressure was very good,which surprised me. We will see how it is at the dentist this afternoon. (yes, I have my second least favorite appointment this p.m. and they always take your blood pressure)
I posted a few photos from Summer UP 2008.
Next Friday is surgery day for the new nipple and the slicing of Mr. Pizza Pocket. The more I think about it the more incredulous I am that this should be done in his office. That same weekend Andrew's baseball team is playing in the State playoffs so I hope to still be able to attend. Dr. says ice will be my friend, and I am used to walking around in a drug induced stupor so maybe I WILL be ok.
Kids are all sleeping. Josh had four friends over and I think they are all still asleep. In an effort to save money, we have the windows open instead of AC, but it is getting hotter and hotter and even I may suggest we turn the air on....
I wish Andrew would wake up. He sleeps all morning, gets up for either football, basketball or baseball practice/games, then leaves to go out with Kait or his friends, and comes home at midnight when I am asleep. I think he is definitely a teenager.
We are going camping this weekend and I think I am the only one who wants to go. I think Shade will like it. We are going with two other families but the boys, Andrew especially, does not want to go. It's only for two night, geesh.
TTFN. It's time to eat breakfast.
Love to you all.
Molly
TMI, I know. Just wanted to set the stage for my mood.
Actually, now that it is over, I feel somewhat relieved of course. My blood pressure was very good,which surprised me. We will see how it is at the dentist this afternoon. (yes, I have my second least favorite appointment this p.m. and they always take your blood pressure)
I posted a few photos from Summer UP 2008.
Next Friday is surgery day for the new nipple and the slicing of Mr. Pizza Pocket. The more I think about it the more incredulous I am that this should be done in his office. That same weekend Andrew's baseball team is playing in the State playoffs so I hope to still be able to attend. Dr. says ice will be my friend, and I am used to walking around in a drug induced stupor so maybe I WILL be ok.
Kids are all sleeping. Josh had four friends over and I think they are all still asleep. In an effort to save money, we have the windows open instead of AC, but it is getting hotter and hotter and even I may suggest we turn the air on....
I wish Andrew would wake up. He sleeps all morning, gets up for either football, basketball or baseball practice/games, then leaves to go out with Kait or his friends, and comes home at midnight when I am asleep. I think he is definitely a teenager.
We are going camping this weekend and I think I am the only one who wants to go. I think Shade will like it. We are going with two other families but the boys, Andrew especially, does not want to go. It's only for two night, geesh.
TTFN. It's time to eat breakfast.
Love to you all.
Molly
Saturday, July 5, 2008
Tech issues resolved.
I'm back! Not only have I been on vacation, neither computer in our house has worked for about a month. Bought some anti-spyware stuff that Josh knew how to install and wallah, we are fixed! At least this laptop is. I am hoping to post some summer UP pictures and will fill you in on well, not much, but I will be back soon.
josh seems to think since he fixed everything, he should get to use this computer.
Later.
Molly
josh seems to think since he fixed everything, he should get to use this computer.
Later.
Molly
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
Relaxing.
I am trying to keep up on blogging. It is my favorite thing to do but where is the time???
We are in the process of upgrading all our cell phones this week. Not an expense we can afford but my cell was missing, Josh's got wet in a hot tub, and Andrew's is older than the hills. Only my Nimmy declined a new one. Funnyhow simple things are fun. I have taken lots of pix using the camera--what I will do with them is another story.
Debbie F is getting her tissue expander placed in a few weeks. Wish her luck. It is nice having that behind me. On an interesting note, I think I have an air bubble in my implant. It feels like the size of a pea, but it is definitely there. I will have to ask Dr. Woody about it when I have pizza pocket sliced off.
We are in a quandary about going to the UP (fishing) this year. Baseball is causing the dilemma. Andrew has a big tournament before and during and after we are there, so we are trying to pick some days when he will miss the least games. Normally, I am ready to get the heck up there, but with summer, it's pretty relaxing HERE, so I don't really care when we go. I am leaving it up to Jim but have told him we are NOT going without Andrew. No way. Andrew really wants to go even though he says it is no big deal to stay home without us. HA!
Reading some Lisa Jackson murder novels these days. Goal is to get Pillars of the Earth done--but I am liking the trashy scary stuff these days.
Isn't the weather great? It could be a tad warmer I think but sleeping is great!
summer summer summer....
Molly
We are in the process of upgrading all our cell phones this week. Not an expense we can afford but my cell was missing, Josh's got wet in a hot tub, and Andrew's is older than the hills. Only my Nimmy declined a new one. Funnyhow simple things are fun. I have taken lots of pix using the camera--what I will do with them is another story.
Debbie F is getting her tissue expander placed in a few weeks. Wish her luck. It is nice having that behind me. On an interesting note, I think I have an air bubble in my implant. It feels like the size of a pea, but it is definitely there. I will have to ask Dr. Woody about it when I have pizza pocket sliced off.
We are in a quandary about going to the UP (fishing) this year. Baseball is causing the dilemma. Andrew has a big tournament before and during and after we are there, so we are trying to pick some days when he will miss the least games. Normally, I am ready to get the heck up there, but with summer, it's pretty relaxing HERE, so I don't really care when we go. I am leaving it up to Jim but have told him we are NOT going without Andrew. No way. Andrew really wants to go even though he says it is no big deal to stay home without us. HA!
Reading some Lisa Jackson murder novels these days. Goal is to get Pillars of the Earth done--but I am liking the trashy scary stuff these days.
Isn't the weather great? It could be a tad warmer I think but sleeping is great!
summer summer summer....
Molly
Monday, June 16, 2008
Randomness
Wow, what a perfect day, weather wise. Unfortunately, I have had an upset stomach. I hate the feeling. Not sure if it is something I ate, or what.
Yesterday was my first day off that I didn't go to wrok. I did check my email and will try to stop by tomorrow. I have to drive to Adrian, Mi tomorrow to pick up Andrew to get him back to Lakeshore for a 5:30 baseball game. He is at basketball camp and Jim and I took him Sunday evening--got back at 1:00 in the a.m. Nothing like a lot of gas and time for a few games of basketball!
I made dinner tonight--I am trying Paula Dean's Chicken Georgia, which is just shallots, mushrooms, butter and mozzarella cheese over chicken. It smells amazing but mystomach isn't up to it. I also made long grain rice but haven't made the green beans yet--Jim is at practice and who knows when he will be home. And of course Josh won't eat anything much so it's just me looking at my wonderful plating of this great smelling dish.
If you read my comments, you see one from Teresa Hartman. I met her on line and she had ACC in her cheek and is a research librarian in the UK...she is wonderful and shows us the power of the internet.
I have had a few blue days about this cancer thing. While I used to obsess, now I am just fearful...waiting for that terrible symptom to show up. I do have to have a colonoscopy--not afraid of that for some reason--and I am also going back to see Dr. Nancy next week.
TTFN. Don't forget about me...!
Yesterday was my first day off that I didn't go to wrok. I did check my email and will try to stop by tomorrow. I have to drive to Adrian, Mi tomorrow to pick up Andrew to get him back to Lakeshore for a 5:30 baseball game. He is at basketball camp and Jim and I took him Sunday evening--got back at 1:00 in the a.m. Nothing like a lot of gas and time for a few games of basketball!
I made dinner tonight--I am trying Paula Dean's Chicken Georgia, which is just shallots, mushrooms, butter and mozzarella cheese over chicken. It smells amazing but mystomach isn't up to it. I also made long grain rice but haven't made the green beans yet--Jim is at practice and who knows when he will be home. And of course Josh won't eat anything much so it's just me looking at my wonderful plating of this great smelling dish.
If you read my comments, you see one from Teresa Hartman. I met her on line and she had ACC in her cheek and is a research librarian in the UK...she is wonderful and shows us the power of the internet.
I have had a few blue days about this cancer thing. While I used to obsess, now I am just fearful...waiting for that terrible symptom to show up. I do have to have a colonoscopy--not afraid of that for some reason--and I am also going back to see Dr. Nancy next week.
TTFN. Don't forget about me...!
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
YUK. Colonoscopy here I come.
Met with the gastroenterologist awhile ago (and forget to write about is) and he highly recommends I get a colonoscopy now. With my mom's history, and my rareismyflippingmiddlename, he said "yes, and I will even write a letter to your insurance company if needed." So I guess that is ok. Better to find out if there is something there, right? I think I scheduled that for July29.
Tuesday, June 3, 2008
Summer and the livin' is easy.
For once in my life, I am sitting here with not much to say.
It is hot and humid in my house. The dog is asleep. Jim and Josh are on a DQ run and have learned that they are closed because of the death of the owner. So now they are heading to Indiana. Andrew and Kait are watching some old basketball game on TV. And here I am.
Mike I.! Carla B wanted to say hello! She has retired this year, along with Leon and Ken and Greg B. Not sure if you know all that but there are very few of us left--even though you haven't been gone all that long, it seems like its been years since the days of the lounge and laughing 'til we cried with Pyles, Carol T., etc. Good ol' days.
Andrew and Josh had a game tonight cancelled by the rain. Andrew is exhausted as he is trying to "train" for basketball, baseball, and football. He is very undecided about basketball and football for next year--mainly because he's just plain tired. With the increased emphasis on winning, it is very difficult to be a three sport athlete. There is no way in the world the kid could actually work a job....and he probably should since he is just a bit spoiled...but I think he would cry from exhaustion. We keep telling him to suck it up, he's only young once, but he continues to whine about it. We will see what he does...I don't really care, but it should would seem wierd not watching him on Friday nights.
We did celebrate the news yesterday that Andrew qualified for the Michigan Promise $4000 scholarship based on his state test scores. Now, mind you, we have kids do the same thing each year so it isn't all that hard, but HE is thrilled because he doesn't have to take any final exams next year. So that is nice.
Did I tell you poor Joshie got two "minuses" on his all A report card? Yup, 6 A's and two A-'s. Josh is such an easy student--I never have to even ask or review anything with him. Andrew had a great year for that too--but in the past, I was always looking over his shoulder making sure things were getting done. I am trying not to be the helicopter parent that I see so often and so far, they are doing quite well. I do still worry about the driving thing but at least his truck is big. : ) Josh does not drive much at all which is a really big mistake as he is scheduled to get his license in late summer.
Ah, the boys are back. Peanut Butter Cup bizzard here I come.
Molly
It is hot and humid in my house. The dog is asleep. Jim and Josh are on a DQ run and have learned that they are closed because of the death of the owner. So now they are heading to Indiana. Andrew and Kait are watching some old basketball game on TV. And here I am.
Mike I.! Carla B wanted to say hello! She has retired this year, along with Leon and Ken and Greg B. Not sure if you know all that but there are very few of us left--even though you haven't been gone all that long, it seems like its been years since the days of the lounge and laughing 'til we cried with Pyles, Carol T., etc. Good ol' days.
Andrew and Josh had a game tonight cancelled by the rain. Andrew is exhausted as he is trying to "train" for basketball, baseball, and football. He is very undecided about basketball and football for next year--mainly because he's just plain tired. With the increased emphasis on winning, it is very difficult to be a three sport athlete. There is no way in the world the kid could actually work a job....and he probably should since he is just a bit spoiled...but I think he would cry from exhaustion. We keep telling him to suck it up, he's only young once, but he continues to whine about it. We will see what he does...I don't really care, but it should would seem wierd not watching him on Friday nights.
We did celebrate the news yesterday that Andrew qualified for the Michigan Promise $4000 scholarship based on his state test scores. Now, mind you, we have kids do the same thing each year so it isn't all that hard, but HE is thrilled because he doesn't have to take any final exams next year. So that is nice.
Did I tell you poor Joshie got two "minuses" on his all A report card? Yup, 6 A's and two A-'s. Josh is such an easy student--I never have to even ask or review anything with him. Andrew had a great year for that too--but in the past, I was always looking over his shoulder making sure things were getting done. I am trying not to be the helicopter parent that I see so often and so far, they are doing quite well. I do still worry about the driving thing but at least his truck is big. : ) Josh does not drive much at all which is a really big mistake as he is scheduled to get his license in late summer.
Ah, the boys are back. Peanut Butter Cup bizzard here I come.
Molly
Sunday, June 1, 2008
Nice.
June 1st--and summer feels like it is here. Nine days left of work. No getting kids up, no asking about homework, no worrying about cancer...uh, well no, but summer means a lot more relaxing!
I don't mind working these last few days--my colleagues are fun to work with and we go out for lunch. : ) I still glad I am not a full year employee--although right now I sure could use the extra $20, 000 or whatever it is. These next two weeks I will be getting ready for fall--cleaning out files, finishing scheduling, interviewing new teachers, making room assignment changes, those types of things. I also have my evaluation with my boss (the superintendent). He always asks us what our highlight of the year was...every year I have to think about it, and every year it is similar to the previous year. My highlights are never major, but are rather the little things that no one ever recognizes or necessarily knows about. One such highlight happened this year just after graduation had ended and I was watching the seniors get on the Project Graduation busses. A mom of a graduate came up to me and thanked me for helping her daughter graduate. Her daughter had stopped coming and I made phone call home to see if I could try to talk her into coming in at least for a meeting...she did, we talked, I encouraged, and she graduated. I did NOT do anything all that special, but just did what any one would do. So yup, she graduated. I am amazed with some students who give up with just weeks left to go. Anyway, that was minor but still made me happy. That is why we go into teaching, I think. The little things.
Yesterday I got attacked by allergies at our girl's softball games. I could not breathe all night. My eyes were watering, my nose running...arggh. But I took a Benadryl and woke up fine. Congrats to our girl's softball team for winning districts. They are ranked number 1 in the state and are on a roll. Also, the team that beat us in baseball also won districts which made us bittersweet....at least we got beat by the best.
I am actually making dinner so must go.
Ah summer. Gotta love it.
Molly
I don't mind working these last few days--my colleagues are fun to work with and we go out for lunch. : ) I still glad I am not a full year employee--although right now I sure could use the extra $20, 000 or whatever it is. These next two weeks I will be getting ready for fall--cleaning out files, finishing scheduling, interviewing new teachers, making room assignment changes, those types of things. I also have my evaluation with my boss (the superintendent). He always asks us what our highlight of the year was...every year I have to think about it, and every year it is similar to the previous year. My highlights are never major, but are rather the little things that no one ever recognizes or necessarily knows about. One such highlight happened this year just after graduation had ended and I was watching the seniors get on the Project Graduation busses. A mom of a graduate came up to me and thanked me for helping her daughter graduate. Her daughter had stopped coming and I made phone call home to see if I could try to talk her into coming in at least for a meeting...she did, we talked, I encouraged, and she graduated. I did NOT do anything all that special, but just did what any one would do. So yup, she graduated. I am amazed with some students who give up with just weeks left to go. Anyway, that was minor but still made me happy. That is why we go into teaching, I think. The little things.
Yesterday I got attacked by allergies at our girl's softball games. I could not breathe all night. My eyes were watering, my nose running...arggh. But I took a Benadryl and woke up fine. Congrats to our girl's softball team for winning districts. They are ranked number 1 in the state and are on a roll. Also, the team that beat us in baseball also won districts which made us bittersweet....at least we got beat by the best.
I am actually making dinner so must go.
Ah summer. Gotta love it.
Molly
Thursday, May 29, 2008
School's out for the summer!
Sigh of relief--the year is over and calmness should be restored to school and my household. No more waking the boys up each morning and waking them up again...and again..GET UP!!!!!!!!!! (in my best mother screech!) No more...for a few months anyway. I have two more weeks.
Jim is off helping a little league team in Edwardsburg. He is so good with little kids. He took Andrew and his buddies with him to help. It looks like it may storm so I expect them home soon. Jim wants to go out to eat for dinner...the Cubs are on TV and we don't get the game so that is why. : ) Joshie is announcing at a different little league game.
Just did my monthly googling of ACC...no new documents or research. Didn't learn anything new. My mom is back on chemo--just half the dosage--she is back eating and her hands are not peeling anymore.
I think both boys did well grade wise..unfortunately, Josh ended up with his first A-....no more perfect gpa. Andrew's gpa should actually go up, but when he said "I know I got three right" on his calculus test I'm not so sure....there were 50 questions. Ugh. I am hoping next year's math will go better. Even though he hovered in the B range most of the year, he claims he has no idea what he was doing all year. Next year's teacher is very diligent on "understanding" so I think it will be better. Andrew used the "I don't get it so why try?" crutch too often.
I am watching Friends right now and that show just makes me laugh. Especially Ross.
I've babbled on long enough about nothing. I know I need a haircut so if you see me, just know that I know it. : )
Love to you all-
Moi
Jim is off helping a little league team in Edwardsburg. He is so good with little kids. He took Andrew and his buddies with him to help. It looks like it may storm so I expect them home soon. Jim wants to go out to eat for dinner...the Cubs are on TV and we don't get the game so that is why. : ) Joshie is announcing at a different little league game.
Just did my monthly googling of ACC...no new documents or research. Didn't learn anything new. My mom is back on chemo--just half the dosage--she is back eating and her hands are not peeling anymore.
I think both boys did well grade wise..unfortunately, Josh ended up with his first A-....no more perfect gpa. Andrew's gpa should actually go up, but when he said "I know I got three right" on his calculus test I'm not so sure....there were 50 questions. Ugh. I am hoping next year's math will go better. Even though he hovered in the B range most of the year, he claims he has no idea what he was doing all year. Next year's teacher is very diligent on "understanding" so I think it will be better. Andrew used the "I don't get it so why try?" crutch too often.
I am watching Friends right now and that show just makes me laugh. Especially Ross.
I've babbled on long enough about nothing. I know I need a haircut so if you see me, just know that I know it. : )
Love to you all-
Moi
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
Crying in Mudville.
Wow. Long time.
Tonight, there is no joy in Mudville. Vikes lost to Lakeshore in the district game, in extra innings. I am just weepy for the seniors. Andrew has another year left but it still is hurting him to see his friends sad. The Lakeshore coach is one of Andrew's summer coaches and a great guy...I am just glad it was a good game and we did well for the most part. But damn I wanted to beat them!!!
My surgery on pizza pocket is in July. They slice it off. Ugh. My nipple is built from skin that is on my breast area--not Pizza Pocket fat. How is that for a visual?
Graduation was wonderful. Stressful, but wonderful. Two more days that I have to get the kids up. I am finished June 12 and really need a good summer vacation since last year pretty much sucked.
Shade ran away last week and ended up in the pokey--yup, the mean old dog catcher got 'er. She was missing all day and when I finally found out, I said 'maybe she's at the pound?" and sure enough, she was. They were about to close so she had to spend the night. Of course, last night I wanted to send her back because she was all nutso over the storm. I died laughing at Jim trying to get her under the bed. Our bedroom has a wooden floor so it is very slippery so Jim would slide her under, she would crawl out, he would slide her back, she would crawl out, he would slide her back. Our floor no longer needs to be dusted.
Doesn't the weather stink? I truly think I suffer from SAD, but only when it is supposed to be summer-like. I am fine with snowstorms, but this cold weather makes me depressed. I just want sunny skies, a pool, a good book, and a large iced tea with lemon.
Thanks for checking in. I still need each and everyone one of you.
Mollyfofollyfeefifofolly
Tonight, there is no joy in Mudville. Vikes lost to Lakeshore in the district game, in extra innings. I am just weepy for the seniors. Andrew has another year left but it still is hurting him to see his friends sad. The Lakeshore coach is one of Andrew's summer coaches and a great guy...I am just glad it was a good game and we did well for the most part. But damn I wanted to beat them!!!
My surgery on pizza pocket is in July. They slice it off. Ugh. My nipple is built from skin that is on my breast area--not Pizza Pocket fat. How is that for a visual?
Graduation was wonderful. Stressful, but wonderful. Two more days that I have to get the kids up. I am finished June 12 and really need a good summer vacation since last year pretty much sucked.
Shade ran away last week and ended up in the pokey--yup, the mean old dog catcher got 'er. She was missing all day and when I finally found out, I said 'maybe she's at the pound?" and sure enough, she was. They were about to close so she had to spend the night. Of course, last night I wanted to send her back because she was all nutso over the storm. I died laughing at Jim trying to get her under the bed. Our bedroom has a wooden floor so it is very slippery so Jim would slide her under, she would crawl out, he would slide her back, she would crawl out, he would slide her back. Our floor no longer needs to be dusted.
Doesn't the weather stink? I truly think I suffer from SAD, but only when it is supposed to be summer-like. I am fine with snowstorms, but this cold weather makes me depressed. I just want sunny skies, a pool, a good book, and a large iced tea with lemon.
Thanks for checking in. I still need each and everyone one of you.
Mollyfofollyfeefifofolly
Monday, May 19, 2008
Summer surgery
Short and quick.
Saw Dr. Messinger and he assures me losing Pizza Pocket is an office procedure that just requires a local anesthetic. And, get this, he will sew me up a new nipple using my current skin right there on the table! He drew on me...I will have two more scars, but I am so mutilated now, who cares I guess. I had the surgery scheduled for July 25 but they called back to re-schedule, which I can't remember to do. Nevertheless, surgery will be this summer.
Honor's Reception is done...Baccalaureate is Wednesday, Graduation Thursday. Exams for underclassmen start Friday...and then four more days! How fast of a year it has been.
I have been overwhelmed with things at work, unexpected things that don't allow me to do my regular job. But we are getting there. I get to work at 7:00 and today was the earliest I have left in weeks. We do have a board meeting tonight so work really isn't done yet for the day. Life is still good.
I went to see my mom this weekend and she is now wearing a wig and looks much better than the last time I saw her. Her wig is sort of a sandy brown...a wierd switch for her--all of us have pretty dark hair, with mine being the lightest. Her fingers looked horrible...red and peeling, but healing better than before. She is dreading her next chemo and has mentioned a few times "people who have just stopped it." I don't think she wants to do it, but not eating and having painful fingers and feet has to be miserable. She has lost 23 pounds. She's a much smaller person than I am--only about 5'6" and much littler all around. She still has her booty (a family trait) and the docs don't want her losing any more weight. She's still tough but manage to go to Panera with us and ate some chicken broth. She manages to get down about 700 calories a day, mainly Ensure. Sister Sue and my daddy take good care of her.
TTFN. Cancer sits but doesn't influence.
Molly
Saw Dr. Messinger and he assures me losing Pizza Pocket is an office procedure that just requires a local anesthetic. And, get this, he will sew me up a new nipple using my current skin right there on the table! He drew on me...I will have two more scars, but I am so mutilated now, who cares I guess. I had the surgery scheduled for July 25 but they called back to re-schedule, which I can't remember to do. Nevertheless, surgery will be this summer.
Honor's Reception is done...Baccalaureate is Wednesday, Graduation Thursday. Exams for underclassmen start Friday...and then four more days! How fast of a year it has been.
I have been overwhelmed with things at work, unexpected things that don't allow me to do my regular job. But we are getting there. I get to work at 7:00 and today was the earliest I have left in weeks. We do have a board meeting tonight so work really isn't done yet for the day. Life is still good.
I went to see my mom this weekend and she is now wearing a wig and looks much better than the last time I saw her. Her wig is sort of a sandy brown...a wierd switch for her--all of us have pretty dark hair, with mine being the lightest. Her fingers looked horrible...red and peeling, but healing better than before. She is dreading her next chemo and has mentioned a few times "people who have just stopped it." I don't think she wants to do it, but not eating and having painful fingers and feet has to be miserable. She has lost 23 pounds. She's a much smaller person than I am--only about 5'6" and much littler all around. She still has her booty (a family trait) and the docs don't want her losing any more weight. She's still tough but manage to go to Panera with us and ate some chicken broth. She manages to get down about 700 calories a day, mainly Ensure. Sister Sue and my daddy take good care of her.
TTFN. Cancer sits but doesn't influence.
Molly
Monday, May 12, 2008
Pizza and Thyroid
Pizza Pocket lives on in case you had forgotten. Tuesday I am heading back to Kalamazoo to see Woody to decide if we want to slice Pizza Pocket off or not. A BC sister on the Internet told me it was an out patient procedure but she came home with 2 drains and an incision that went nearly to her back shoulder blade. UGH........that makes me want to say NO. But I will see what dear Woody says. He hasn't done anything too painful to me so I will trust his opinion. By the way, Miss Boobie is doing ok--my incision still itches and there is a rough spot that I itch too much so I have a really red area. But all in all, she's doing her thing, hanging around like a good boobie does.
I also met with Dr. T this week to go over additional bloodwork. All is fine there. He does want me to see a colon doctor (that is easier to spell than gastroendommmmmmblahblahblah) just to see what I should do about early screening. So I do that June 5th. I do not know the results of my thyroid test. I am hoping they say "WOW! No wonder you are fat!!!" and tell me my thyroid is really out of whack...it is out of whack, but I think the meds are working just fine, unfortunately. : )
Seniors are almost done. Andrew will be lost without his senior buddies. I used to make fun of my friends who are all weepy about their senior kids but I am right there with them now, thinking about senior pictures, graduation, etc. I do think this summer we need Andrew to really commit to where he wants to visit. He has no interest in going out of state as of now.
TTFN. Jim made wonderful steaks. It's 9:12 and I am about to eat half a cow.
"WOW! No wonder I'm fat."
Hugs,
Molly
I also met with Dr. T this week to go over additional bloodwork. All is fine there. He does want me to see a colon doctor (that is easier to spell than gastroendommmmmmblahblahblah) just to see what I should do about early screening. So I do that June 5th. I do not know the results of my thyroid test. I am hoping they say "WOW! No wonder you are fat!!!" and tell me my thyroid is really out of whack...it is out of whack, but I think the meds are working just fine, unfortunately. : )
Seniors are almost done. Andrew will be lost without his senior buddies. I used to make fun of my friends who are all weepy about their senior kids but I am right there with them now, thinking about senior pictures, graduation, etc. I do think this summer we need Andrew to really commit to where he wants to visit. He has no interest in going out of state as of now.
TTFN. Jim made wonderful steaks. It's 9:12 and I am about to eat half a cow.
"WOW! No wonder I'm fat."
Hugs,
Molly
Saturday, May 10, 2008
Fist fights in the office
I'm sure no one is reading anymore--don't blame ya one bit. I honestly haven't had time to even think about blogging, but here I am, saying hello: HELLO
Nothing really exciting or new right now. My mom has hit the chemo wall as they say, and now has every crappy side effect she could have. Her lips are so cracked and peeling--she can hardly eat--and the nausea has started. Her hands are a mess too--cracked and splitting, along with a little neuropathy (tingling). They've totally taken her off one drug, and are lowering the dosage of the other. She has lost 20 pounds and is sustaining her current weight with Ensure.
Tomorrow is Mother's Day and I am feeling very guilty about not going to see her, but Jim got Cubs' tickets and we really need to spend time together as a family. With his helping with baseball, and my schedule, we are seeing more of each other driving by than at home. Andrew's team lost again today, so Jim is in a funk...Josh's team hardly ever wins so no funk going on there! Jim feels bad for missing Josh's games, and Josh LOVES to make him feel guilty...Andrew is bumming because he isn't playing at all defensively (but is the DH) so people are just a bit grouchy around here! We are going to have DQ tonight so at least I will be happy. : )
Let's see. I lost my debit card. PANIC city for me. I think I left it in one of the machines that keeps it...my bank's machine is just a swiper so when I went to the keeper one, I just drove off. I have already ordered another one, but since Jim and I never have cash I thought I would starve or something. : ) We got gas last night in Coldwater, MI and the pump stopped at $100 for the Yukon. Then I got gas today in my tiny Malibu and it was $50. Arggggghhhhhhh.
The seniors are done on Wednesday. Amazing. This year has to be the fastest year ever. 'course I spent much of it at doctor's appointments.
Yesterday, our Student Council sponsored a Pancake Breakfast for Relay for Life. They made $500. The kids loved it--missing seminar to eat! While this was going on, my two polite young children were in my office asking for money and actually got in a fist fight while I was getting it for them. I bet that has not happened in too many principals' offices anywhere in the world. What was worse was I was on the phone with a parent--luckily, she is a friend of mine and laughed it off but I about suspended both of them. I called Jim at work and told him I should get extra duty mother pay for having to be with them 24-7. He at least gets to go to work to avoid them for a few hours. : )
MMMMM. Time to run. Cancer is about 5th on the "topics on my brain" list.
That's a good thing.
Molly
Mother and Dog Owner of the Year
Nothing really exciting or new right now. My mom has hit the chemo wall as they say, and now has every crappy side effect she could have. Her lips are so cracked and peeling--she can hardly eat--and the nausea has started. Her hands are a mess too--cracked and splitting, along with a little neuropathy (tingling). They've totally taken her off one drug, and are lowering the dosage of the other. She has lost 20 pounds and is sustaining her current weight with Ensure.
Tomorrow is Mother's Day and I am feeling very guilty about not going to see her, but Jim got Cubs' tickets and we really need to spend time together as a family. With his helping with baseball, and my schedule, we are seeing more of each other driving by than at home. Andrew's team lost again today, so Jim is in a funk...Josh's team hardly ever wins so no funk going on there! Jim feels bad for missing Josh's games, and Josh LOVES to make him feel guilty...Andrew is bumming because he isn't playing at all defensively (but is the DH) so people are just a bit grouchy around here! We are going to have DQ tonight so at least I will be happy. : )
Let's see. I lost my debit card. PANIC city for me. I think I left it in one of the machines that keeps it...my bank's machine is just a swiper so when I went to the keeper one, I just drove off. I have already ordered another one, but since Jim and I never have cash I thought I would starve or something. : ) We got gas last night in Coldwater, MI and the pump stopped at $100 for the Yukon. Then I got gas today in my tiny Malibu and it was $50. Arggggghhhhhhh.
The seniors are done on Wednesday. Amazing. This year has to be the fastest year ever. 'course I spent much of it at doctor's appointments.
Yesterday, our Student Council sponsored a Pancake Breakfast for Relay for Life. They made $500. The kids loved it--missing seminar to eat! While this was going on, my two polite young children were in my office asking for money and actually got in a fist fight while I was getting it for them. I bet that has not happened in too many principals' offices anywhere in the world. What was worse was I was on the phone with a parent--luckily, she is a friend of mine and laughed it off but I about suspended both of them. I called Jim at work and told him I should get extra duty mother pay for having to be with them 24-7. He at least gets to go to work to avoid them for a few hours. : )
MMMMM. Time to run. Cancer is about 5th on the "topics on my brain" list.
That's a good thing.
Molly
Mother and Dog Owner of the Year
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