Since there is a new "sister" in this ACC fight, I thought I would save her some time reading through my numerous, lengthy, sometimes stuid, sometimes whiny, posts and just write some facts about ACC as I know them. So Karen, here it is in a nutshell.
ACC in the breast has a way better prognosis than ACC in the salivary gland. Do not get the two confused.
The reason, doctors say, is because the chances of getting clear margins in the breast are way better than in the neck area. The most important thing as they get all of the tumor. My tumor was so big that I had to had a mastectomy.
PET/CT scans are the best way to see if it has spread. However, PET scans don't pick up slow growing cancers very easily so the CT is important.
I was never told the GRADE of my tumor. I would ask if you can. Stage is interesting--just basically goes on size to tell you the truth.
It isn't likely that your tumor has gone to the lymph nodes but I still recommend a sentinel node biopsy.
I was going to have a lumpectomy but when they couldn't get clear margins I had the mastectomy. I 100 percent recommend the mastectomy--radiation might work but getting the tumor out is the only way to go.
I "googled" "adenoid cystic carcinoma of the breast" at least 2938597934 times. I learned a lot. Much of it very positive. But there are no guarantees with ANY cancer. But the odds are better with this cancer for the most part.
Chemo does NOT work on this cancer and if you have a doctor who tells you otherwise, ASK for the research that shows that it works. There is none. Chemo is nothing to take lightly.
My biggest fear is lung mets. That is where the cancer will typically spread. Most likely, it hasn't. So far, my lungs are clear.
I see my onco every six months.
More later.
molly
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Saturday, November 22, 2008
Another ACC 'r
I just got an email from my rare cancer forum and there is a new member who is 43 and was just diagnosed. I know how scared she is and wish i could make it go away. I hope she visits my blog so she can see that there is life during and after cancer and it is going to be ok.
Having said that, yeh, I still worry. A new thing for me though is to not obsess over physical changes. i have had this ear ache for ever, and now I get minor spells of dizziness when I turn my head...so I have decided I have some sort of fluid in my ear. Good enough for me.
Jim got his new (used) car yesterday. Its a black Yukon XL which is very similar to his other car, just younger and nicer. He seems happy and i like how slippery the seats are and how clean it is. Nice thing about totaling your car--you get a new, clean one! : )
Kalamazoo College is coming to school Monday to talk to Andrew and another senior football player about their program. The coach said that there are 13 football players that also play baseball so that has gotten Andrew's attention. K-college is 30K a year so this will be an interesting conversation! : )
That's all for now!
Molly
Having said that, yeh, I still worry. A new thing for me though is to not obsess over physical changes. i have had this ear ache for ever, and now I get minor spells of dizziness when I turn my head...so I have decided I have some sort of fluid in my ear. Good enough for me.
Jim got his new (used) car yesterday. Its a black Yukon XL which is very similar to his other car, just younger and nicer. He seems happy and i like how slippery the seats are and how clean it is. Nice thing about totaling your car--you get a new, clean one! : )
Kalamazoo College is coming to school Monday to talk to Andrew and another senior football player about their program. The coach said that there are 13 football players that also play baseball so that has gotten Andrew's attention. K-college is 30K a year so this will be an interesting conversation! : )
That's all for now!
Molly
Sunday, November 16, 2008
Settling.
We did survive last week's car issues and already have a settlement on Jim's car. We felt it was fair based on all my research and on Monday, the money should be deposited in our checking account. We have our buddy Tim looking for either a Yukon XL or Suburban for us...my only requirement is a DVD player--we seem to take long trips in it so that would be nice. Even so, we could always just buy personal DVD players for the kids.
Discussions in our household have turned to who is going to the UP with whom. Right now, the plan is that Josh will drive up with Uncle Johnny and his boys the Friday before Thanksgiving. I am worried about his missing his math class, but he swears he has it under control. Then, on Tuesday, Andrew will drive up with Chris and Tate, after the boys are done with basketball. As of now, Aida and the kids are driving up on Tuesday--brave Aida--and then Jim, Danny, myself and Shady will come up Wednesday. I am not sure what Matt and Brooke are doing--they may even go with us on Wednesday. Not sure if Chase is going. Aunt Pam is not going this year--she is on call--so that is a major bummer. Ginger loves having us all up there--and as you all know, I love it too!!!
Danny nominated Andrew for the Moose Krause Scholar Athlete award for football this year. The nominees come mainly from Indiana I think. It's quite an honor to win it, but most kids who win it have a near perfect gpa....the award focuses more on academic achievements than athletic. I guess there is a really nice dinner with a good speaker that Andrew will be invited to attend. Regardless of if he wins, it is nice that Danny did this for him.
Josh learned to cook French toast this morning. The house is smoky right now! : ) He liked it though. Just one more thing to add to his cooking repertoire. Andrew still can't cook much of anything but today he did prove to me he knows how to run the dryer. (this is not as easy as it sounds in our house--the on/off knob is broken so he has to use pliers to turn the machine on!)
Andrew's dead week(s) are over as basketball tryouts start this week. Josh has another story due for the Niles Daily Star so life stays busy.
Must go finish laundry.
M.
Discussions in our household have turned to who is going to the UP with whom. Right now, the plan is that Josh will drive up with Uncle Johnny and his boys the Friday before Thanksgiving. I am worried about his missing his math class, but he swears he has it under control. Then, on Tuesday, Andrew will drive up with Chris and Tate, after the boys are done with basketball. As of now, Aida and the kids are driving up on Tuesday--brave Aida--and then Jim, Danny, myself and Shady will come up Wednesday. I am not sure what Matt and Brooke are doing--they may even go with us on Wednesday. Not sure if Chase is going. Aunt Pam is not going this year--she is on call--so that is a major bummer. Ginger loves having us all up there--and as you all know, I love it too!!!
Danny nominated Andrew for the Moose Krause Scholar Athlete award for football this year. The nominees come mainly from Indiana I think. It's quite an honor to win it, but most kids who win it have a near perfect gpa....the award focuses more on academic achievements than athletic. I guess there is a really nice dinner with a good speaker that Andrew will be invited to attend. Regardless of if he wins, it is nice that Danny did this for him.
Josh learned to cook French toast this morning. The house is smoky right now! : ) He liked it though. Just one more thing to add to his cooking repertoire. Andrew still can't cook much of anything but today he did prove to me he knows how to run the dryer. (this is not as easy as it sounds in our house--the on/off knob is broken so he has to use pliers to turn the machine on!)
Andrew's dead week(s) are over as basketball tryouts start this week. Josh has another story due for the Niles Daily Star so life stays busy.
Must go finish laundry.
M.
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
BOOM. TWICE BOOM.
WOW. Just when life gets smooth and maybe even mundane, BOOM! Bambi's large overgrown father decides to slam into Molly's car, causing $3200 worth of damage--and get this--three days later the love of my life TOTALS our Suburban.
Yup, Friday night, coming home from my mom's surgery I hit a deer--well actually, it hit me. I couldn't even get out of my car to see the damage--but a man at the gas station that I was able to drive to--said "man, your car is messed up! And you should see all the fur!" So, yesterday, I spend all day on the phone with my insurance company but do get an estimate for fixing it--a nice $3200.
And then tonight, Jim is on his way to job number 2, coaching little 7th graders in basketball, and a truck slams into him in an intersection. The SUV is totaled--he is ok--but somehow, he ended up with the ticket. When he called me to tell me he said that the guy that hit him told him he (jim) ran a red light--honestly, I think he was stunned as all the airbags went off--and then the cop told him that since he wasn't there, and jim wasn't sure what happened jim ends up with the ticket....needless to say, we are going to fight it, as the more Jim reviewed it in his head, he thinks there is no way it happened the way the guy said. The guy also ran to Jim first, saying he was ok, and "the light was red, buddy" to Jim...almost like he was convincing Jim of it. Then, the guy let the ambulance take him away. All Jim worried about was his basketball players. Poor Jim. If you know him, he HATES conflict and is the nicest man on Earth, so he would never argue with anyone...but now he is pretty upset. So. Didn't our day just suck. But thank heavens, he is ok, and so is the other man.
To make matters worse, my mom is really struggling with her surgery. The surgery was supposed to take 2-4 hours and took 5--then when she was in recovery, she was filled with all kinds of fluid and it caused her all kinds of problems that were near life threatening. Once she overcame that obstacle, she was ok for one day, but then started vomiting so much they took her off all liquids (she hadn't even started food yet) and now she has an NG tube to keep emptying her stomach of the bile her gallbladder is sending it. Oh yeh, in the surgery, they found that she has lots of gallstones but her surgeon decided not to take it out as the surgery was already so extensive. So that sucks too. I don't even want to call her because she is so grumpy.
Again, we are all alive but gosh, what a few days it has been. We still have to figure out cars to drive--thank goodness for great family members.
Maybe tomorrow i will have something nice to say.
Molly
Yup, Friday night, coming home from my mom's surgery I hit a deer--well actually, it hit me. I couldn't even get out of my car to see the damage--but a man at the gas station that I was able to drive to--said "man, your car is messed up! And you should see all the fur!" So, yesterday, I spend all day on the phone with my insurance company but do get an estimate for fixing it--a nice $3200.
And then tonight, Jim is on his way to job number 2, coaching little 7th graders in basketball, and a truck slams into him in an intersection. The SUV is totaled--he is ok--but somehow, he ended up with the ticket. When he called me to tell me he said that the guy that hit him told him he (jim) ran a red light--honestly, I think he was stunned as all the airbags went off--and then the cop told him that since he wasn't there, and jim wasn't sure what happened jim ends up with the ticket....needless to say, we are going to fight it, as the more Jim reviewed it in his head, he thinks there is no way it happened the way the guy said. The guy also ran to Jim first, saying he was ok, and "the light was red, buddy" to Jim...almost like he was convincing Jim of it. Then, the guy let the ambulance take him away. All Jim worried about was his basketball players. Poor Jim. If you know him, he HATES conflict and is the nicest man on Earth, so he would never argue with anyone...but now he is pretty upset. So. Didn't our day just suck. But thank heavens, he is ok, and so is the other man.
To make matters worse, my mom is really struggling with her surgery. The surgery was supposed to take 2-4 hours and took 5--then when she was in recovery, she was filled with all kinds of fluid and it caused her all kinds of problems that were near life threatening. Once she overcame that obstacle, she was ok for one day, but then started vomiting so much they took her off all liquids (she hadn't even started food yet) and now she has an NG tube to keep emptying her stomach of the bile her gallbladder is sending it. Oh yeh, in the surgery, they found that she has lots of gallstones but her surgeon decided not to take it out as the surgery was already so extensive. So that sucks too. I don't even want to call her because she is so grumpy.
Again, we are all alive but gosh, what a few days it has been. We still have to figure out cars to drive--thank goodness for great family members.
Maybe tomorrow i will have something nice to say.
Molly
Thursday, November 6, 2008
Another rare cancer.
My pal Debbie's cousin was DX'd with a rare "phyllode's tumor" breast cancer this week. Very similar to mine in that it is really, really rare and doesn't respond to chemo. "Cure" (and I use that term with hope and reality) is surgery. What is in the water here in Niles? She was diagnosed at Lakeland and for them to diagnose two really rare cancers must have had them talking the the lab! Today was her surgery I think...a lumpectomy so far. I hope all went well.
Jim is at basketball practice for his 7th graders. He is such a good guy. Took work off to get to his game on time but then the game got canceled. Lucky me, he had time to clean the house though!
He could have easily canceled practice but he's such a work horse. Last week a couple of his baseball players from way back at Howard Little league wanted to know when he would start working out with them again...he just loves coaching.
Still have not heard from MSU for Andrew. Nor CMU.
This week and next are "dead weeks" for high school so Andrew actually has some nights off. Josh got a detention today,which he deserved. If I was his teacher he would drive me nuts i think. Talks too much and likes to negotiate everything. But gosh, he sure brings a smile to my face when I see him.
John and Crazy Mil are back in the UP until after Thanksgiving. I will try not to talk so much about my love for the Up this coming season. But I am excited.
tomorrow my mom is having her colostomy reversal...she will be in the hospital for about 5 days. I am going up after lunch tomorrow.
Nice chatting with you--
molly
Jim is at basketball practice for his 7th graders. He is such a good guy. Took work off to get to his game on time but then the game got canceled. Lucky me, he had time to clean the house though!
He could have easily canceled practice but he's such a work horse. Last week a couple of his baseball players from way back at Howard Little league wanted to know when he would start working out with them again...he just loves coaching.
Still have not heard from MSU for Andrew. Nor CMU.
This week and next are "dead weeks" for high school so Andrew actually has some nights off. Josh got a detention today,which he deserved. If I was his teacher he would drive me nuts i think. Talks too much and likes to negotiate everything. But gosh, he sure brings a smile to my face when I see him.
John and Crazy Mil are back in the UP until after Thanksgiving. I will try not to talk so much about my love for the Up this coming season. But I am excited.
tomorrow my mom is having her colostomy reversal...she will be in the hospital for about 5 days. I am going up after lunch tomorrow.
Nice chatting with you--
molly
Saturday, November 1, 2008
Life is going well.
Hi! The sounds of ping pong balls are pinging throughout my house. Jim's buddy Rick is over and Connor, the kid's cousin, plus Kait. Notre Dame football is on, the house is fairly clean and I cleaned the freezer I think for the first time since we owned this freezer. Josh is getting ready to go on a "double date" to the Haunted House. Josh still does not want his driver's license. Isn't that strange? He could have it since he is 16.
The first marking period is over here for the kids and both could have done better...I hate B+'s--I know that sounds strange, but for the most part, my kids don't work that hard and both boys said they could get better grades if they wanted to....arggh. Andrew is just making it in AP Psych. Luckily both kids are still on the honor roll but I wish they would work harder.
Check out this link of the photography studio where Andrew had his pictures taken.
http://harringtonpix.com
Then go the BLOG and scroll down until you see him.
Andrew did learn he was accepted at Western Michigan University as well as GVSU, but we are still waiting on Central Michigan and Michigan State. Then it is visit time.
Andrew also learned this week that he made All-Conference as a quarterback. He was disappointed that it was only honorable mention but there are two really good quarterbacks in his conference--both going D-1--so I am proud of him.
My mom is having surgery this Friday to reattach her colostomy "stuff." She will be in the hospital for 4 days...I am going to take Friday off I think. I have not missed any school this year and should sit with my dad as he gets pretty nervous about the surgery. My mom's pet/ct were clear-no hot spots so the chemo worked. She is getting stronger everyday.
Debbie F had her implant placed this week and is doing very well. Good for her.
thanks for visiting!..
Molly
The first marking period is over here for the kids and both could have done better...I hate B+'s--I know that sounds strange, but for the most part, my kids don't work that hard and both boys said they could get better grades if they wanted to....arggh. Andrew is just making it in AP Psych. Luckily both kids are still on the honor roll but I wish they would work harder.
Check out this link of the photography studio where Andrew had his pictures taken.
http://harringtonpix.com
Then go the BLOG and scroll down until you see him.
Andrew did learn he was accepted at Western Michigan University as well as GVSU, but we are still waiting on Central Michigan and Michigan State. Then it is visit time.
Andrew also learned this week that he made All-Conference as a quarterback. He was disappointed that it was only honorable mention but there are two really good quarterbacks in his conference--both going D-1--so I am proud of him.
My mom is having surgery this Friday to reattach her colostomy "stuff." She will be in the hospital for 4 days...I am going to take Friday off I think. I have not missed any school this year and should sit with my dad as he gets pretty nervous about the surgery. My mom's pet/ct were clear-no hot spots so the chemo worked. She is getting stronger everyday.
Debbie F had her implant placed this week and is doing very well. Good for her.
thanks for visiting!..
Molly
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
The Village Idiot
Kinda crazy that it has been two weeks since I last blogged. Amazing! I was taking a shower last night and realized that I had not thought of cancer ONCE the entire day. That is a first.
Football is over for Andrew and I am so pleased he had such a successful season. For someone who wasn't going to play to someone who played just about every down on both sides of the ball, I am so proud of his attitude-- he went into the season with no expectations of any playing time but believed in himself and ended up having a great time. I am very proud of him not for scoring touchdowns and making great passes, but for not giving up.
Andrew has also learned that he has been accepted at Grand Valley. We were looking over dorm options just to get a sense of what is out there. We are waiting mainly for Michigan State now--I am pretty confident he will get accepted at WMU and CMU so once we know all, we will do some visits. He thinks I want him to go to Michigan State--I do think it is a really neat campus--but want him to go where he wants. He keeps wondering where all his friends are going--I do not want him to make a decision based on that. Luckily, all four are decent teaching colleges.
I can't remember if I told you that I am scheduled to "build" my nipple on December 12. Dr. M still wants the tattooed area to "settle"--it looks settled to me--so we wait. I am also supposed to see Dr. Nancy soon--I probably should call.
How about those wonderful snowflakes last night? Andrew is already thinking snow days.
My Joshie had his first article published in the Niles Daily Star. He did a great job--he is my natural writer, where Andrew is creative as heck, but thinks commas are optional! Josh did such a good job and had so many compliments. He has decided he wants to be a journalist--will probably end up majoring in English just like I did. He loves to talk about theme and symbolism and all kind of literary things.
One last thing I must confess to ONCE AGAIN make you realize that you are not that big of an idiot. I, Molly Elizabeth Holdship Brawley have that covered. As you know, I had the fiasco with my electricity but have things completely under control, even paying bills EARLY. One really hectic morning the first week of October I knew I needed to get Andrew a class t-shirt but had no cash or checks in my purse so I quick grabbed a new set of checks from the stack and off I went. Paid for Andrew's shirt, a fundraiser for three different thing at NHS, Josh's lunches, y dental deductable, etc. RARELY do I write checks but wrote 12 from October 1 thru Oct 15. Oct 16 my dentist calls to tell me my checked bounced. NO WAY. I had lots of money in my checking account for once...I knew there had to be a bank error. I was armed with all my statements and my meanest voice ever when I called........
Yup, I had grabbed a check book that was from a closed account. ARGGGHHHHH!
Someday, I will have my act together. Just think, they put me in charge of YOUR CHILDREN!
Molly
Football is over for Andrew and I am so pleased he had such a successful season. For someone who wasn't going to play to someone who played just about every down on both sides of the ball, I am so proud of his attitude-- he went into the season with no expectations of any playing time but believed in himself and ended up having a great time. I am very proud of him not for scoring touchdowns and making great passes, but for not giving up.
Andrew has also learned that he has been accepted at Grand Valley. We were looking over dorm options just to get a sense of what is out there. We are waiting mainly for Michigan State now--I am pretty confident he will get accepted at WMU and CMU so once we know all, we will do some visits. He thinks I want him to go to Michigan State--I do think it is a really neat campus--but want him to go where he wants. He keeps wondering where all his friends are going--I do not want him to make a decision based on that. Luckily, all four are decent teaching colleges.
I can't remember if I told you that I am scheduled to "build" my nipple on December 12. Dr. M still wants the tattooed area to "settle"--it looks settled to me--so we wait. I am also supposed to see Dr. Nancy soon--I probably should call.
How about those wonderful snowflakes last night? Andrew is already thinking snow days.
My Joshie had his first article published in the Niles Daily Star. He did a great job--he is my natural writer, where Andrew is creative as heck, but thinks commas are optional! Josh did such a good job and had so many compliments. He has decided he wants to be a journalist--will probably end up majoring in English just like I did. He loves to talk about theme and symbolism and all kind of literary things.
One last thing I must confess to ONCE AGAIN make you realize that you are not that big of an idiot. I, Molly Elizabeth Holdship Brawley have that covered. As you know, I had the fiasco with my electricity but have things completely under control, even paying bills EARLY. One really hectic morning the first week of October I knew I needed to get Andrew a class t-shirt but had no cash or checks in my purse so I quick grabbed a new set of checks from the stack and off I went. Paid for Andrew's shirt, a fundraiser for three different thing at NHS, Josh's lunches, y dental deductable, etc. RARELY do I write checks but wrote 12 from October 1 thru Oct 15. Oct 16 my dentist calls to tell me my checked bounced. NO WAY. I had lots of money in my checking account for once...I knew there had to be a bank error. I was armed with all my statements and my meanest voice ever when I called........
Yup, I had grabbed a check book that was from a closed account. ARGGGHHHHH!
Someday, I will have my act together. Just think, they put me in charge of YOUR CHILDREN!
Molly
Saturday, October 18, 2008
A Fabulous Group of People
This is the staff at Niles High School. We wore our breast cancer t-shirts for THINK PINK week.
A plethora of nothingness,,,, again.
Lazy day. We didn't even have dinner tonight. And of course I am hungry now! Will have to check out the pantry.
Niles lost again last night but had a really good showing against Lakeshore--even though Lakeshore is claiming they put in their second string the whole time. Ah well...Andrew played well, no serious injuries on our team. One of Andrew's summer baseball teammates from Lakeshore may have torn his ACL though. Not good, I hate to see any athlete get hurt.
I met with Dr. M this week and I will be having the sewn nipple procedure in December. We decided the tattoo is good enough. It is an in office procedure so I assume will be fairly easy.
Today and yesterday I have had some of those weird lightening bolt burns in my implant boob. It really reminds me of the day I found my lump. I think early next week I will call Dr.Nancy. I am supposed to go in soon anyway, and i think I will request an MRI. The pain comes and goes more than it did on that fateful day but it is still bothersome. there are other things it could be...fluids...nerve endings, etc...but the pain is so familiar.
I missed my friend Cindy''s birthday party last night. I need to call her and get her a card!
What else. Andrew's still waiting to hear on some college apps..he still has a few more to apply to and is retaking the ACT this coming weekend. His ACT is decent but may hurt him in some cases. I am worried about it way more than he is. He still just wants to be a senior. i guess I should let him for now.
going to go sniff for food. Love to you all. Don't forget to click on my ads up there! It is an easy way to earn money!
Molly
Niles lost again last night but had a really good showing against Lakeshore--even though Lakeshore is claiming they put in their second string the whole time. Ah well...Andrew played well, no serious injuries on our team. One of Andrew's summer baseball teammates from Lakeshore may have torn his ACL though. Not good, I hate to see any athlete get hurt.
I met with Dr. M this week and I will be having the sewn nipple procedure in December. We decided the tattoo is good enough. It is an in office procedure so I assume will be fairly easy.
Today and yesterday I have had some of those weird lightening bolt burns in my implant boob. It really reminds me of the day I found my lump. I think early next week I will call Dr.Nancy. I am supposed to go in soon anyway, and i think I will request an MRI. The pain comes and goes more than it did on that fateful day but it is still bothersome. there are other things it could be...fluids...nerve endings, etc...but the pain is so familiar.
I missed my friend Cindy''s birthday party last night. I need to call her and get her a card!
What else. Andrew's still waiting to hear on some college apps..he still has a few more to apply to and is retaking the ACT this coming weekend. His ACT is decent but may hurt him in some cases. I am worried about it way more than he is. He still just wants to be a senior. i guess I should let him for now.
going to go sniff for food. Love to you all. Don't forget to click on my ads up there! It is an easy way to earn money!
Molly
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Sunday, October 12, 2008
220 kids headed to Wicked!
What a wonderful weekend...could it be any prettier out? How great it is to see the leaves changing but also have 80 degree temps!
I have a doctor's appointment this week with my plastic surgeon. Not sure what he will be doing since it is just a 15 minute appointment--I think. I know we have to darken the areola again, and then talk about actually sewing the nipple part. Probably another wasted drive, but as Ginger says, it's a lunch out! : )
The Vikes won Friday night so that was a great start to this weekend. The mood is always so much brighter when we win. We always eat breakfast with Danny and Aida and our kids on Sundays during football season--the nice thing about it is by Sunday, everyone is looking forward to the next game. We have the Lakeshore Lancers coming to town next week. Andrew played baseball with about 5 starters on their team, including their quarterback, so it will be fun to see them again. They are a fabulous football team so we will have to be perfect to beat them. Stranger things have happened that is for sure!
The other fantastic news this weekend was the surprise we got to tell the senior class on Friday. Lonnie Ali has always wanted to do something special for Asaad's class since he was a freshman here and we have finally put something together. She wanted it to be something cultural and memorable for every child, regardless of means. So, she and Muhammad will be sending the entire senior class to Chicago by charter bus to see the Broadway play Wicked. We will first eat lunch at The Hard Rock Cafe--Chicago and then head to the play. All expenses paid by the Ali's.
You can imagine the reaction we got when we told the seniors on Friday. The best part for me was seeing every child, from every walk of life, excited about it. We are going December 3, and thanks to Signal Travel in Niles, we (NHS) don't have to worry about all the arrangements, as they agreed to take care of it for free. Of course, we still have a lot of logistics to do, permission slips, bus assignments, preparing the kids to dress appropriately, etc. but that is all fun stuff. Can you tell I am excited too? Just another reason I love Lonnie and Muhammad.
I spent all afternoon paying bills. Not fun, but a good feeling when we actually have money left over! We ate a LOT this weekend and it wasn't cheap.
Andrew's senior pix are done...I should be able to pick them up this week. I plan to scan some so you all can see.
Much love to you all--please don't forget this is Breast Cancer Awareness month. Wear pink and BE HAPPY!
Molly
I have a doctor's appointment this week with my plastic surgeon. Not sure what he will be doing since it is just a 15 minute appointment--I think. I know we have to darken the areola again, and then talk about actually sewing the nipple part. Probably another wasted drive, but as Ginger says, it's a lunch out! : )
The Vikes won Friday night so that was a great start to this weekend. The mood is always so much brighter when we win. We always eat breakfast with Danny and Aida and our kids on Sundays during football season--the nice thing about it is by Sunday, everyone is looking forward to the next game. We have the Lakeshore Lancers coming to town next week. Andrew played baseball with about 5 starters on their team, including their quarterback, so it will be fun to see them again. They are a fabulous football team so we will have to be perfect to beat them. Stranger things have happened that is for sure!
The other fantastic news this weekend was the surprise we got to tell the senior class on Friday. Lonnie Ali has always wanted to do something special for Asaad's class since he was a freshman here and we have finally put something together. She wanted it to be something cultural and memorable for every child, regardless of means. So, she and Muhammad will be sending the entire senior class to Chicago by charter bus to see the Broadway play Wicked. We will first eat lunch at The Hard Rock Cafe--Chicago and then head to the play. All expenses paid by the Ali's.
You can imagine the reaction we got when we told the seniors on Friday. The best part for me was seeing every child, from every walk of life, excited about it. We are going December 3, and thanks to Signal Travel in Niles, we (NHS) don't have to worry about all the arrangements, as they agreed to take care of it for free. Of course, we still have a lot of logistics to do, permission slips, bus assignments, preparing the kids to dress appropriately, etc. but that is all fun stuff. Can you tell I am excited too? Just another reason I love Lonnie and Muhammad.
I spent all afternoon paying bills. Not fun, but a good feeling when we actually have money left over! We ate a LOT this weekend and it wasn't cheap.
Andrew's senior pix are done...I should be able to pick them up this week. I plan to scan some so you all can see.
Much love to you all--please don't forget this is Breast Cancer Awareness month. Wear pink and BE HAPPY!
Molly
Thursday, October 2, 2008
Stephanie's decision
As I mentioned, Stephanie is another ACC/breast sister who was diagnosed this summer. She lives in Port Huron. Stephanie had a bilateral mastectomy because there were issues in her non-cancerous breast that I am unsure of, but regardless, she got to have both off. (I say "got to" because if Dr. Ansari had recommended it, I would have too!) Anyway, the problem is this...
Some of her doctors are recommending chemo. I know all of you who have read this blog know that this goes against everything I have learned, and what my doctors have told me. But I so understand why she is second guessing herself...she IS leaning to no chemo, but because she was aggressive in having both breasts off she feels she might regret not having chemo. Kristina left her a wonderfully informative message on her blog (the wonders of the internet!!!!!!!) so I hope that helps and I hope that no matter what she decides, she finds peace with it. I still think about not having chemo and wishing I could have but still remember Dr. M and Dr. Nancy saying "NO! you do not want chemo". There is also another bc sister on another listserv who got leukemia from her chemo, which I did not know could happen. Scary stuff. Anyway, pray for Stephanie to make a good decision for HER.
Josh is really enjoying the homecoming festivities this year. He worked on the float a lot, and is MR. Competitive in all the dress up days. Today he dressed as Sleepy, for Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs....Andrew hasn't done much...he's sooooo exhausted from football...more so than any year. He is playing quarterback still but is also going to play corner tomorrow night, so that means another game of non-stop play. But he loves it. And this was a kid who in early August wasn't sure he was even going to play. This weekend I am giving Kait some money to take Andrew shopping because if he wears gold Niles baseball/basketball/football shorts (he has like 10 pair) one more day I think I will scream. For one thing, the shorts are too short so he looks goofy and no matter what t-shirt he wears, nothing matches. Kait will be his fashion consultant! :)
My job has been crazy. I swear you couldn't make up half the stuff that we see in our offices. We really have the BEST kids, but we also have some nutty situations we deal with. Did I ever tell you about the girl who thought she was a vampire? That was like my first year as an admin. She would actually try to bite people. You'll be glad to know she has since graduated and outgrew her vampire stage.
I think i will watch the debates tonight. I'm not Miss Politics but like to stay informed. I also want to be able to understand the pundits!
I hope every is doing well out there. I am up to $70 some dollars all thanks to you clicking on my ads--so thank you for clicking away!
Molly
Some of her doctors are recommending chemo. I know all of you who have read this blog know that this goes against everything I have learned, and what my doctors have told me. But I so understand why she is second guessing herself...she IS leaning to no chemo, but because she was aggressive in having both breasts off she feels she might regret not having chemo. Kristina left her a wonderfully informative message on her blog (the wonders of the internet!!!!!!!) so I hope that helps and I hope that no matter what she decides, she finds peace with it. I still think about not having chemo and wishing I could have but still remember Dr. M and Dr. Nancy saying "NO! you do not want chemo". There is also another bc sister on another listserv who got leukemia from her chemo, which I did not know could happen. Scary stuff. Anyway, pray for Stephanie to make a good decision for HER.
Josh is really enjoying the homecoming festivities this year. He worked on the float a lot, and is MR. Competitive in all the dress up days. Today he dressed as Sleepy, for Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs....Andrew hasn't done much...he's sooooo exhausted from football...more so than any year. He is playing quarterback still but is also going to play corner tomorrow night, so that means another game of non-stop play. But he loves it. And this was a kid who in early August wasn't sure he was even going to play. This weekend I am giving Kait some money to take Andrew shopping because if he wears gold Niles baseball/basketball/football shorts (he has like 10 pair) one more day I think I will scream. For one thing, the shorts are too short so he looks goofy and no matter what t-shirt he wears, nothing matches. Kait will be his fashion consultant! :)
My job has been crazy. I swear you couldn't make up half the stuff that we see in our offices. We really have the BEST kids, but we also have some nutty situations we deal with. Did I ever tell you about the girl who thought she was a vampire? That was like my first year as an admin. She would actually try to bite people. You'll be glad to know she has since graduated and outgrew her vampire stage.
I think i will watch the debates tonight. I'm not Miss Politics but like to stay informed. I also want to be able to understand the pundits!
I hope every is doing well out there. I am up to $70 some dollars all thanks to you clicking on my ads--so thank you for clicking away!
Molly
Monday, September 29, 2008
Fall is here I think.
This will be a quick post.
Suddenly getting hit with the reality that Andrew needs to apply to colleges. We have determined that he will apply to Central, Western, Michigan State, and Grand Valley. He is re-taking the ACT in October but I think he will still be ok for Central and Western with his current score. I am glad his College Writing class required him to write college essays as what he wrote will cover most of the essays of these schools. It gives him a good start on the tough part of the apps...the online part is really rather easy. Especially since I can look it over before he sends it in!
Still coughing. It is homecoming week at NHS. And of course the cold bad weather decides to hit. Tomorrow night is the Powderpuff game and then Friday is pep rally, parade, game and dance. We have lost our last two games and it has been quite sad in our house.
Just wanted to mention that today is our angel Ava Christine's birthday. Ava continues to hold a special place in my heart as an everyday reminder to love all children and to appreciate all that we hold dear to us. Happy Heavenly Birthday Ava, you will never, ever be forgotten.
ok, must go cough some more.
Love to you all!
Molly
Suddenly getting hit with the reality that Andrew needs to apply to colleges. We have determined that he will apply to Central, Western, Michigan State, and Grand Valley. He is re-taking the ACT in October but I think he will still be ok for Central and Western with his current score. I am glad his College Writing class required him to write college essays as what he wrote will cover most of the essays of these schools. It gives him a good start on the tough part of the apps...the online part is really rather easy. Especially since I can look it over before he sends it in!
Still coughing. It is homecoming week at NHS. And of course the cold bad weather decides to hit. Tomorrow night is the Powderpuff game and then Friday is pep rally, parade, game and dance. We have lost our last two games and it has been quite sad in our house.
Just wanted to mention that today is our angel Ava Christine's birthday. Ava continues to hold a special place in my heart as an everyday reminder to love all children and to appreciate all that we hold dear to us. Happy Heavenly Birthday Ava, you will never, ever be forgotten.
ok, must go cough some more.
Love to you all!
Molly
Saturday, September 20, 2008
Poop. The Vikes lose a tough tough one
What a downer last night was. We lost 20-16 to Marshall, which in any other year would have been a decent showing but we were up 16-0 going into the 4th quarter. This is one of those losses that is hard to shake...three touchdowns were called back, and two of them were horrible, film proven, mistakes by the refs. You just sit there and think "what if". The problem being married to a coach and in a family of coaches is that I KNOW what this loss means--most likely our playoff chances are done. It will take a hellacious effort for us to beat two of the three games vs. Lakeshore, St. Joe and Portage Northern. ARGHHKK...I don't want to even think about it. Andrew again had to play both offense and defense and against a physical team like Marshall, I think the kids playing both ways got tired and I know it affected Andrew. He is walking like a 90 year old man today. But you know, it isn't all that serious and as teenagers always do, we will recover!
I have been in bed almost all day because I definitely have a terrible chest/throat infection. i am coughing like crazy--sweating--blowing my nose--uck. I think Andrew is getting better as is Josh. Josh came home from school early on Friday and slept all day. Jim is the only one that doesn't have it.
Still upset about Valerie. And wondering about Stephanie, whose doctor is recommending chemo. Just curious about her path report--makes me think she has some other mixture of wierd cells in her tumor.
I need to take a shower. My cold sweat is beginning to be annoying.
Molly
I have been in bed almost all day because I definitely have a terrible chest/throat infection. i am coughing like crazy--sweating--blowing my nose--uck. I think Andrew is getting better as is Josh. Josh came home from school early on Friday and slept all day. Jim is the only one that doesn't have it.
Still upset about Valerie. And wondering about Stephanie, whose doctor is recommending chemo. Just curious about her path report--makes me think she has some other mixture of wierd cells in her tumor.
I need to take a shower. My cold sweat is beginning to be annoying.
Molly
Thursday, September 18, 2008
Valerie's ACC is back.
Valerie is an ACC/breast survivor I met online. She was diagnosed a little bit after I was and had a mastectomy with no other treatment. Just this last week she went to see her surgeon about a cyst on her back and he noticed two small lumps in an area above the mastectomy site. They were painful. Yup, her ACC is back. Her news sent me reeling into reality. This is cancer we are talking about and no matter what my attitude is, no matter what my tests reveal, etc., it still could come back. Valerie has had such great attitude--never once worried out loud to me anyway--and went about her life. She did go visit Dr. Helen Chew who is supposedly the ACC/breast guru on the West coast when she was first diagnosed. Dr. Chew said she was good to go.
The good news is the prelim MRI's are showing those two lumps only so I think it just means more surgery for her. I don't think she had reconstruction. Sigh. And I was feeling so good!
Going to run up to watch the love of my life coach. Such a good wife I am!
M
The good news is the prelim MRI's are showing those two lumps only so I think it just means more surgery for her. I don't think she had reconstruction. Sigh. And I was feeling so good!
Going to run up to watch the love of my life coach. Such a good wife I am!
M
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Day TWO of no school. Mike I, read this.
Day Two of no school. There is a dam on the north side of Niles that the authorities were concerned may break..it was built in the early 1920's and they are not sure how much she can hold. Well, here it is the afternoon and she is ok...thank goodness. I got an email from my superintendent and we have re-routed some buses so we WILL have school tomorrow. Goodness. Two days off already. Andrew is thrilled because as a senior he doesn't have to make up any days --just in case we get many snow days. I think we have enough time to have 4-5 snow days...and rain days I guess!
Mike I--I have been meaning to tell you this for about a month! Every year the Daily Star does a BEST...restaurant, doctor, hair salon, etc. This year they had BEST teacher and you were nominated! I thought that was so cool. There were about 10 nominations...I was flattered to be nominated too..along with Jenny Nate...but I just thought it was neat that someone who had moved away was nominated. Someone is still thinking about you!( Because Danny B was also nominated for BEST COACH, I think Ginger probably did all the nominating of us Brawleys. : )
Took the kids to Hacienda for lunch. Why I even order any food is beyond me...I usually eat all the chips. The area where the restaurant is was under a no boil order because of the water and we first got our pop and it was awful...when we asked why, she said it was from a 2 liter. Now for most of you, this is no big deal, but those of you who know me well, know my vice is my Diet Pepsi (or Coke) fountain pop. It has to be fountain pop. I don't like cans, or bottles. Luckily, she said, they were just trying to use up the 2 liters but that the fountain pop was working. Such trauma for me.
My kids are obsessed with ping pong. Jim is supposedly getting a ping pong table from a friend and we are going to put it in our...well kitchen/family room area. It will look ridiculous but Andrew is only here for another year, and I really don't care, so what the heck? Cancer allows us to do silly things like put a ping pong table in the middle of the family room and kitchen.
Both Andrew and Josh have awful colds or snotty heads...not sure what it is, but I am becoming OCD with my Bath and Body Work antibacterial hand serum....ugh. Andrew was up all night and is much worse than Josh. They both slept in so that should help a little.
Not much else to say. Love to you all!
Molly
Mike I--I have been meaning to tell you this for about a month! Every year the Daily Star does a BEST...restaurant, doctor, hair salon, etc. This year they had BEST teacher and you were nominated! I thought that was so cool. There were about 10 nominations...I was flattered to be nominated too..along with Jenny Nate...but I just thought it was neat that someone who had moved away was nominated. Someone is still thinking about you!( Because Danny B was also nominated for BEST COACH, I think Ginger probably did all the nominating of us Brawleys. : )
Took the kids to Hacienda for lunch. Why I even order any food is beyond me...I usually eat all the chips. The area where the restaurant is was under a no boil order because of the water and we first got our pop and it was awful...when we asked why, she said it was from a 2 liter. Now for most of you, this is no big deal, but those of you who know me well, know my vice is my Diet Pepsi (or Coke) fountain pop. It has to be fountain pop. I don't like cans, or bottles. Luckily, she said, they were just trying to use up the 2 liters but that the fountain pop was working. Such trauma for me.
My kids are obsessed with ping pong. Jim is supposedly getting a ping pong table from a friend and we are going to put it in our...well kitchen/family room area. It will look ridiculous but Andrew is only here for another year, and I really don't care, so what the heck? Cancer allows us to do silly things like put a ping pong table in the middle of the family room and kitchen.
Both Andrew and Josh have awful colds or snotty heads...not sure what it is, but I am becoming OCD with my Bath and Body Work antibacterial hand serum....ugh. Andrew was up all night and is much worse than Josh. They both slept in so that should help a little.
Not much else to say. Love to you all!
Molly
Monday, September 15, 2008
Where is the Ark?
HI HI HI HI HI!
Today was a "no day", not a "snow day" of school. Niles sits in two counties and one of the counties, Cass, was flooded so badly that the road commissioners said that they would not allow buses to travel their roads...thus, we were canceled today. I normally love snow days, but mentally didn't really need the day off...mid-week cancellations are the best, but I guess I shouldn't complain. The rain was insane this weekend. Both kids decided not to go to the Notre Dame game, that was how bad it was!
Slept in 'til 8 AM and continued trying to dry out our basement. I know we aren't any worse off than some people, but our basement smells wet, looks wet, and IS wet. I hate going down there but laundry must be done. Tonight when Jim gets home from work we will continue to try to dry things out. We have a carpet remnant near the machines that is soaking wet. Our two dehumidifiers are working overtime! I can imagine the bacteria and mold growing down there. Maybe I need to wear a mask?
I must say that I am very happy and calm these days. Hardly thinking about cancer...I am still wheezing a little bit...but so is Andrew so I think we are just suffering from allergies. I am just happy and pretty much ignoring anything physical --LIKE A NORMAL PERSON!
My bc sister Stephanie had to have her tissue expanders removed because she wasn't healing. Gosh, that would have been terrible. It's hard to believe that I am over a year away...was home on mastectomy leave this time last year...wow, it went fast. Steph, I bet healing goes much better this time. Keep up the good work.
Kristina, I am so jealous you went to Europe! Congrats girl!
What else? The Vikes won another game last Friday--against my alma mater, Kalamazoo Central. We played very well offensively and seemed pretty confident. But, once again, another team awaits us--Marshall--and they are always really good and physical. Andrew is at practice as we speak. Sports must continue despite flooding, of course.
Today was a great day. I am so happy I am off the worry kick, even if I know it is short lived.
TTFN.
Molly
Today was a "no day", not a "snow day" of school. Niles sits in two counties and one of the counties, Cass, was flooded so badly that the road commissioners said that they would not allow buses to travel their roads...thus, we were canceled today. I normally love snow days, but mentally didn't really need the day off...mid-week cancellations are the best, but I guess I shouldn't complain. The rain was insane this weekend. Both kids decided not to go to the Notre Dame game, that was how bad it was!
Slept in 'til 8 AM and continued trying to dry out our basement. I know we aren't any worse off than some people, but our basement smells wet, looks wet, and IS wet. I hate going down there but laundry must be done. Tonight when Jim gets home from work we will continue to try to dry things out. We have a carpet remnant near the machines that is soaking wet. Our two dehumidifiers are working overtime! I can imagine the bacteria and mold growing down there. Maybe I need to wear a mask?
I must say that I am very happy and calm these days. Hardly thinking about cancer...I am still wheezing a little bit...but so is Andrew so I think we are just suffering from allergies. I am just happy and pretty much ignoring anything physical --LIKE A NORMAL PERSON!
My bc sister Stephanie had to have her tissue expanders removed because she wasn't healing. Gosh, that would have been terrible. It's hard to believe that I am over a year away...was home on mastectomy leave this time last year...wow, it went fast. Steph, I bet healing goes much better this time. Keep up the good work.
Kristina, I am so jealous you went to Europe! Congrats girl!
What else? The Vikes won another game last Friday--against my alma mater, Kalamazoo Central. We played very well offensively and seemed pretty confident. But, once again, another team awaits us--Marshall--and they are always really good and physical. Andrew is at practice as we speak. Sports must continue despite flooding, of course.
Today was a great day. I am so happy I am off the worry kick, even if I know it is short lived.
TTFN.
Molly
Thursday, September 11, 2008
Don't ever forget.
Well hello there...
Long time. Doing well. Still no phone call from Dr. A so I am not really thinking about it. I still have allergies though...Andrew is suffering from the same thing I am.
I am loving the cooler weather. Hard to believe as I am a summer lover, but it has been too hot at school and getting ready in the morning brings me what feels like hot flashes. This is tough time of year to figure out what to wear. Cold in the morning, hot by afternoon.
Today I got in a physical altercation with our copier machine at work. Somehow I became the goddess of all printing and had to print 1400 letters to parents about how to access grades on line. That in itself takes time because I have to watch the letters come off the printer or they fly all over the place! The BAD part of it today was the order before mine kept jamming and after 7 times of sticking my hands in to get the flippin' jams out , I posted a big sign on the thing that read "I am EVIL." But of course, Marcia, my secretary fixed it all and I calmed down. I think the whole process took about two hours. Not the best use of my time.
Today is 9/11. I always pause on this day as I do NOT want any of us to forget about this day. I know we all remember what we were doing and where we were.
Jim is in Kalamazoo coaching and Josh is at home driving me nuts. Right now he is taking a straw and putting it under his armpit, and then running to the bathroom, slamming the door, and making awful noises. He is also filming this on a digital camera. Why are boys so silly??? Andrew is at practice and team dinner...not sure what Josh and I are going to have. Now Josh is taking Combo pretzels and putting a straw through th cheesy part of the combo... so he has a "combo tree."
Not much else to say, believe it or not. Looking forward to the weekend but always seem to have growing piles of laundry.
Check those boobies out tonight if you haven't in awhile.
M.
Long time. Doing well. Still no phone call from Dr. A so I am not really thinking about it. I still have allergies though...Andrew is suffering from the same thing I am.
I am loving the cooler weather. Hard to believe as I am a summer lover, but it has been too hot at school and getting ready in the morning brings me what feels like hot flashes. This is tough time of year to figure out what to wear. Cold in the morning, hot by afternoon.
Today I got in a physical altercation with our copier machine at work. Somehow I became the goddess of all printing and had to print 1400 letters to parents about how to access grades on line. That in itself takes time because I have to watch the letters come off the printer or they fly all over the place! The BAD part of it today was the order before mine kept jamming and after 7 times of sticking my hands in to get the flippin' jams out , I posted a big sign on the thing that read "I am EVIL." But of course, Marcia, my secretary fixed it all and I calmed down. I think the whole process took about two hours. Not the best use of my time.
Today is 9/11. I always pause on this day as I do NOT want any of us to forget about this day. I know we all remember what we were doing and where we were.
Jim is in Kalamazoo coaching and Josh is at home driving me nuts. Right now he is taking a straw and putting it under his armpit, and then running to the bathroom, slamming the door, and making awful noises. He is also filming this on a digital camera. Why are boys so silly??? Andrew is at practice and team dinner...not sure what Josh and I are going to have. Now Josh is taking Combo pretzels and putting a straw through th cheesy part of the combo... so he has a "combo tree."
Not much else to say, believe it or not. Looking forward to the weekend but always seem to have growing piles of laundry.
Check those boobies out tonight if you haven't in awhile.
M.
Saturday, September 6, 2008
No news is good news...I hope
Hello--Well, no phone call from Dr. A's office. He said they would call if it was anything to be concerned about. No call. Hopefully, they have the report and found no reason to call. I started to second guess myself about what he said to me...I know he told me to call on Friday if I wanted...otherwise, I wouldn't hear from them unless there was something to be concerned about. So I took that to mean they would call me on Friday. But maybe they are waiting until Monday? See, that is how my brain works. But yesterday, I was ok until I started playing things over in my head. I did NOT want to call..I literally FREEZE when I am waiting for results. So I am going on the assumption that all is well. My sister said Dr. A probably saw the results himself since the xray was in his office so she thinks I for sure would have heard by now.
So today I am buying a new purse. My second NED (no evidence of disease)purse. I need to get a fall Vera Bradley...my summer one...well, I used it every single day and it is getting ugly from dirt...yes, I did wash it...but the purse getting dirty is a great reason to get a new one don't you think?
I did not see Stand up for Cancer last night on TV but heard it was great. It is about time we did something like that. I am not insensitive to the AIDS dilemma but have always felt, even before I was diagnosed that CANCER should also have the same fund raising efforts on such a celebrity scale. I hope it went well. On a sad note, a fellow BC sister on my Yahoo list group died this week. She was 42. They posted her obit on the list serv and I about freaked when I saw her...she looked JUST LIKE ME. Dark curly hair, a bit on the larger size. Plus she was triple negative. She didn't have ACC, and her mets came exactly one year after her diagnosis. Triple Negative is a very serious breast cancer. I am triple negative but all ACC is but it is still considered a slow growing cancer...most triple negative breast cancer is aggressive.
Andrew won last night! He had a great game personally, but got a 15 yard unsportsmanlike conduct penalty! so not like Andrew. I was actually proud that he showed some emotion. Not much rattle him. Supposedly what happened is a kid tackled him and said "take that! In fact, you are gonna be takin' it all night long"--the kid was in his face, spitting etc. So Andrew said, with his arms open, "well, you'd better start now 'cause it's 6 -0 already." Well, the ref saw and heard that part, but not the other. (I still think Andrew must have dropped the F bomb but was too embarrassed to tell me) We ended up winning 34-0. They took Andrew out when it was 28-0 but he finished with a touchdown, and two touchdown passes. So a good night. (next week will be much tougher so trust me, I need to brag when I can)
We are not doing much today except cleaning...all the mess we haven't touched all week. The bathrooms are disgusting. We have this awful rusty water and it is really ticking me off with my new white tiled showers. the bathroom is less than three years old but it looks 20 years old with the tile. YUCK. Any good products out there? We do soften our water with rust salt.
Today is the first Notre Dame game...we will watch that. I don't think Andrew is going. He likes going but also likes watching the game in the comfort of his own home. I can't stand the crowds...but man, ND fans are loyal! Anyway, I hope the Irish kick some butt today.
TTFN...like I said, no news is good news. That's what I keep praying for anyway.
Molly
So today I am buying a new purse. My second NED (no evidence of disease)purse. I need to get a fall Vera Bradley...my summer one...well, I used it every single day and it is getting ugly from dirt...yes, I did wash it...but the purse getting dirty is a great reason to get a new one don't you think?
I did not see Stand up for Cancer last night on TV but heard it was great. It is about time we did something like that. I am not insensitive to the AIDS dilemma but have always felt, even before I was diagnosed that CANCER should also have the same fund raising efforts on such a celebrity scale. I hope it went well. On a sad note, a fellow BC sister on my Yahoo list group died this week. She was 42. They posted her obit on the list serv and I about freaked when I saw her...she looked JUST LIKE ME. Dark curly hair, a bit on the larger size. Plus she was triple negative. She didn't have ACC, and her mets came exactly one year after her diagnosis. Triple Negative is a very serious breast cancer. I am triple negative but all ACC is but it is still considered a slow growing cancer...most triple negative breast cancer is aggressive.
Andrew won last night! He had a great game personally, but got a 15 yard unsportsmanlike conduct penalty! so not like Andrew. I was actually proud that he showed some emotion. Not much rattle him. Supposedly what happened is a kid tackled him and said "take that! In fact, you are gonna be takin' it all night long"--the kid was in his face, spitting etc. So Andrew said, with his arms open, "well, you'd better start now 'cause it's 6 -0 already." Well, the ref saw and heard that part, but not the other. (I still think Andrew must have dropped the F bomb but was too embarrassed to tell me) We ended up winning 34-0. They took Andrew out when it was 28-0 but he finished with a touchdown, and two touchdown passes. So a good night. (next week will be much tougher so trust me, I need to brag when I can)
We are not doing much today except cleaning...all the mess we haven't touched all week. The bathrooms are disgusting. We have this awful rusty water and it is really ticking me off with my new white tiled showers. the bathroom is less than three years old but it looks 20 years old with the tile. YUCK. Any good products out there? We do soften our water with rust salt.
Today is the first Notre Dame game...we will watch that. I don't think Andrew is going. He likes going but also likes watching the game in the comfort of his own home. I can't stand the crowds...but man, ND fans are loyal! Anyway, I hope the Irish kick some butt today.
TTFN...like I said, no news is good news. That's what I keep praying for anyway.
Molly
Thursday, September 4, 2008
A good report....but.......
I am going to try to be detailed here because this post will be one that I will probably refer to as I continue this cancer journey. Especially if everything turns out okay.
Today I had a 6 month check up with Dr. Ansari, my oncologist. Everything was fine--I will say that so you don't worry as you read this--BUT, because of my annoying cough, he decided to do a chest x-ray. I will not know my results until tomorrow. Ok...now that I got that out there you know my frame of mind. Feeling really good about the visit but worried about the chest ray results.
So I get there and I first have blood work. Easy. Then I ended up waiting quite awhile to see Dr. Ansari. While I was waiting for him in the patient room, I freaked myself out for a moment because the nurse had the computer screen turned on...I immediately thought he was going to show me something in my breast MRI, when actually, she was just typing in data. I didn't remember the computer screen thingy being in the other rooms I was in so my mind assumed I was in the "I have bad news" room. Silly.
So I waited some more. I could hear Dr. A with a patient next to me...I knew he was a new patient as I heard him make introductions. I figured the poor guy needed lots of time so I certainly wasn't upset or anything. Finally, Dr. A came in and said hello, and started reading my charts, etc. He ALWAYS stops at the letter from Dr. Wolf, my ENT at U of M, and makes mention of it. (Like it is the first time we have ever talked about the letter that is almost a year old). Anyway, then he finds my MRI report and says "normal" so that is good. Then he says he needs to examine me and "'when we are done we will talk." His exam was basically a pat down through my clothes and all over my neck and shoulders...I don't know what he was feeling for (I don't mean to suggest there was anything inappropriate about it..it was just weird) When he was done, I asked him to double check my neck area and explained how bad it always hurt and he said anything that was hurting me was related to my schwannoma removal in 2001...I asked him if there was any research to show ACC breast metting (my shortened word for metasticizing) to neck and he said NONE. (which I have found as well but it was nice to hear it from him) He then said 'but we will do a PET/CT in 6 months, not for the cancer but because Dr. Wolf wants to see if the schwannoma has returned. So that was something I didn't expect him to say.
Then he sat back and said "so how are you doing?" I said "physically, I think I am doing well, but HOW IN THE HECK DO I DEAL WITH ALL THE WORRY OVER EVERY LITTLE SYMPTOM???? I explained how I thought I had liver cancer, (he smiled) how I thought my neck was filled with ACC, and now that I have had a minor cough for three weeks, i thought I had lung cancer. As soon as I mentioned that, he said "then we do a routine chest xray. that is easy" He knew I was very nervous about it but obviously, it is the thing to do since chest xrays are no big deal in terms of cost or radiation. He said " we do today. i will only call you if there is an issue. But you can call tomorrow if you want." (he knows me!) He then talked to me for about 15 minutes about how normal I am, that most of his patients feel good every week prior to visits with him except to the week just prior, and how good they feel when they leave him. (that is me to a T) He was very understanding and said that in time, it will get easier. I pointed out that my cancer comes back YEARS later and he said "do not confuse ACC/breast with ACC elsewhere. They are two different things. With ACC/breast you are "surgically cured" as you had clear margins" (that was nice to hear too, but i know better but will hang my hat on it after tomorrow's results!) I then told him I thought I should see him every 4 months and he smiled and said "you call me whenever you want, but I do not need to see you every 4 months. " He explained that it simply wasn't necessary and that it could cause me more anxiety than I already am having, He did say "I would never refuse to see you". I then said "well, it sounds like I am more worried than you are." And he said "I am not worried." So that was that.
I did have my chest xray right there...after it was done, the tech was calling the place I had my previous xray so i am guessing that that is routine, OR, he saw something, which easily could be that granuloma. That freaked me out a bit but I am just hopeful it was routine and that they just want to double check on the granuloma. It just has to be normal. Oh, by the way, after I told him that part of my problem with worry was not trusting him (as i don't see him very often) he said he would ALWAYS tell me the truth and never hides anything. I assumed that to be true but it was nice he verbalized it.
The other slightly interesting thing was that in March, I WILL have a bilateral mammogram. I didn't think they did that with implants but they do. So I have that a few days after my PET/CT, and then I will see him again somewhere around March 10. Gosh, it will be so nice to go through Christmas without doctor's appointments to worry about.
So as I type this, I feel like I have an elephant sitting on my chest. It could be worry, or my jalapeno peppers on my sandwich at lunch today...or maybe allergies. Or maybe a heart attack. Hopefully it will pass. I am still coughing but I can contribute it to post nasal crap...it certainly isn't awful...and normally, i wouldn't think anything of it....but,,,,,,,,,,,,
ANYWAY. That is my report. I walked into house today after school and literally tip-toed into the room where the answering machine is...no one had called from his office so I feel good about today at least. I will probably die of a heart attack if they call tomorrow. ARGH. Can"t think about that now>
Josh is at the freshman game...Jim is coaching...Andrew went to dinner with the football team at Pete's Patio (YUM!) and I have made pork chops that are simmering with some red potatoes. Glad the rain is here finally...just hope it clears up for tomorrow night's game.
Pray for a clear chest xray for me...it sure can't hurt can it???
MUCHO LOVE to you all!
Molly
Today I had a 6 month check up with Dr. Ansari, my oncologist. Everything was fine--I will say that so you don't worry as you read this--BUT, because of my annoying cough, he decided to do a chest x-ray. I will not know my results until tomorrow. Ok...now that I got that out there you know my frame of mind. Feeling really good about the visit but worried about the chest ray results.
So I get there and I first have blood work. Easy. Then I ended up waiting quite awhile to see Dr. Ansari. While I was waiting for him in the patient room, I freaked myself out for a moment because the nurse had the computer screen turned on...I immediately thought he was going to show me something in my breast MRI, when actually, she was just typing in data. I didn't remember the computer screen thingy being in the other rooms I was in so my mind assumed I was in the "I have bad news" room. Silly.
So I waited some more. I could hear Dr. A with a patient next to me...I knew he was a new patient as I heard him make introductions. I figured the poor guy needed lots of time so I certainly wasn't upset or anything. Finally, Dr. A came in and said hello, and started reading my charts, etc. He ALWAYS stops at the letter from Dr. Wolf, my ENT at U of M, and makes mention of it. (Like it is the first time we have ever talked about the letter that is almost a year old). Anyway, then he finds my MRI report and says "normal" so that is good. Then he says he needs to examine me and "'when we are done we will talk." His exam was basically a pat down through my clothes and all over my neck and shoulders...I don't know what he was feeling for (I don't mean to suggest there was anything inappropriate about it..it was just weird) When he was done, I asked him to double check my neck area and explained how bad it always hurt and he said anything that was hurting me was related to my schwannoma removal in 2001...I asked him if there was any research to show ACC breast metting (my shortened word for metasticizing) to neck and he said NONE. (which I have found as well but it was nice to hear it from him) He then said 'but we will do a PET/CT in 6 months, not for the cancer but because Dr. Wolf wants to see if the schwannoma has returned. So that was something I didn't expect him to say.
Then he sat back and said "so how are you doing?" I said "physically, I think I am doing well, but HOW IN THE HECK DO I DEAL WITH ALL THE WORRY OVER EVERY LITTLE SYMPTOM???? I explained how I thought I had liver cancer, (he smiled) how I thought my neck was filled with ACC, and now that I have had a minor cough for three weeks, i thought I had lung cancer. As soon as I mentioned that, he said "then we do a routine chest xray. that is easy" He knew I was very nervous about it but obviously, it is the thing to do since chest xrays are no big deal in terms of cost or radiation. He said " we do today. i will only call you if there is an issue. But you can call tomorrow if you want." (he knows me!) He then talked to me for about 15 minutes about how normal I am, that most of his patients feel good every week prior to visits with him except to the week just prior, and how good they feel when they leave him. (that is me to a T) He was very understanding and said that in time, it will get easier. I pointed out that my cancer comes back YEARS later and he said "do not confuse ACC/breast with ACC elsewhere. They are two different things. With ACC/breast you are "surgically cured" as you had clear margins" (that was nice to hear too, but i know better but will hang my hat on it after tomorrow's results!) I then told him I thought I should see him every 4 months and he smiled and said "you call me whenever you want, but I do not need to see you every 4 months. " He explained that it simply wasn't necessary and that it could cause me more anxiety than I already am having, He did say "I would never refuse to see you". I then said "well, it sounds like I am more worried than you are." And he said "I am not worried." So that was that.
I did have my chest xray right there...after it was done, the tech was calling the place I had my previous xray so i am guessing that that is routine, OR, he saw something, which easily could be that granuloma. That freaked me out a bit but I am just hopeful it was routine and that they just want to double check on the granuloma. It just has to be normal. Oh, by the way, after I told him that part of my problem with worry was not trusting him (as i don't see him very often) he said he would ALWAYS tell me the truth and never hides anything. I assumed that to be true but it was nice he verbalized it.
The other slightly interesting thing was that in March, I WILL have a bilateral mammogram. I didn't think they did that with implants but they do. So I have that a few days after my PET/CT, and then I will see him again somewhere around March 10. Gosh, it will be so nice to go through Christmas without doctor's appointments to worry about.
So as I type this, I feel like I have an elephant sitting on my chest. It could be worry, or my jalapeno peppers on my sandwich at lunch today...or maybe allergies. Or maybe a heart attack. Hopefully it will pass. I am still coughing but I can contribute it to post nasal crap...it certainly isn't awful...and normally, i wouldn't think anything of it....but,,,,,,,,,,,,
ANYWAY. That is my report. I walked into house today after school and literally tip-toed into the room where the answering machine is...no one had called from his office so I feel good about today at least. I will probably die of a heart attack if they call tomorrow. ARGH. Can"t think about that now>
Josh is at the freshman game...Jim is coaching...Andrew went to dinner with the football team at Pete's Patio (YUM!) and I have made pork chops that are simmering with some red potatoes. Glad the rain is here finally...just hope it clears up for tomorrow night's game.
Pray for a clear chest xray for me...it sure can't hurt can it???
MUCHO LOVE to you all!
Molly
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