I'm a different kind of tired after two days at work. It is a great tired and I can't wait to sleep good tonight. I am still having some insomnia issues in the middle of the night but I predict this will get better the more I work.
The first two days back at work were BUSY! Within 5 minutes of being back I suspended a kid for cussing at a teacher regarding his cell phone. Then, another student was having an AWFUL day and was aggravated with the other principals. Always the voice of sanity, I tried to calm her down with soft words, a nice smile, etc. She promptly told me to SHUT UP and walked herself right out the front door.
I am so busy with just minor things that the days are flying...and here it is Tuesday afternoon already. This morning I had my first trip to Dr. Messinger--formerly known as Woody. I think I owe him a bit more respect so I will call him Dr. M now. He really is nice and has done a great job. The expander process took a total of about 10 minutes. I get there and put on the famous blue tissue vest and wait for the nurse and Dr. M. Nurse comes in and uses a little Geiger counter of sorts and scans my incision near Mr. Ski Slope. There is a little pendulum on it and it starts to swing right above the area of the slope that has the port in it. So she marks it with an X and gets out the needles, saline, and syringe. The needle in the syringe is HUGE so I have to remark--luckily, the thing ain't going in me, it's just used to get the saline into the syringe. Dr. M comes in and double checks the mark for the port and concurs that X marks the spot. Before I know it, he inserts this needle (that is still pretty darn big) and nurse hooks up the syringe and "fills me up."
I could sort of feel it and it just felt like fluid going in, not painful, just wierd. She put in 50 cc and may do 60 cc next week but wants to make sure I can tolerate that much stretching. She also said tomorrow might be a little worse but so far it has just felt strange and achy, but not really painful. Last night I made Jim feel Mr. Ski Slope because it really felt HARD and like it was stretching my skin so tight...he was aghast at how it felt and felt really sorry for me...it was like this hard piece of something was fighting to get out of my skin. Now today, it is much more cushiony to touch from the saline...but it still feels tight from the inside. All in all, it was pretty painless but I can definitely tell there is something sloshing around in there.
One thing of interest was our trip to the ladie's restroom at the doctor's office before we headed home. My dear friend Betty, who has to be the kindest most sincere person I know, escorted me to this appointment--lucky her! Anyway, in the ladie's restroom there was an engraved sign on the back of the door to the restroom that read:
If you have any problems, go to the second floor, Suite 200.
That was it! So what the heck do you think that meant? Betty had pondered it earlier and for the life of us, we can't figure out what it meant. I thought I might visit to see what I could do about my frizzy hair...I think next time I will take Ginger and knowing her, she will go up to Suite 200 and solve the world's problems. We just thought that was a funny sign.
So. I heard from another ACC/breast person today--her name is Valerie and she lives in California. She is taking her time deciding what/when to do her mastectomy. She is also going to UC Davis for a second opinion. It is great to talk to her too as we compare what our doctors have told us. She and I were both diagnosed at the same time so I firmly believe there are more people out there and that this cancer is probably more prevalent than the literature professes. She is, like Kristina, so much calmer about the whole thing though than I am. I need to learn from them and not worry so much. I will continue to try to do this, I promise. But my ear still hurts but at least that pesky rash is long gone! (remember how freaked I was about that?)
Shout outs to Mike Isabell! It was great to hear from you! You know if you were still in Niles you would be hearing ALL about it anyway--and you would tell me NOT TO WORRY ABOUT THINGS I CAN'T CONTROL! Miss you Mike!
Ok. Going to go take a short kitty nap. Not too long or I will be up all night but 20 minutes will do a body good. Jim and I are walking Shade at night so that is good.
I am doing better today than I have in about a week. Thank goodness for good friends, a good job, and just nice people in my life. We all should take time to thank the heavens for that!