Monday, August 20, 2007

Lightning bolts and great friends

Boob hurts today. It is healing, and little lightning bolts of pain keep striking near the incisions. It is rather strange.

Many of you know Robert, that crazy dude I work with. Today he sits at my desk and says "I'm looking for another job." And I say "WHY???" He says,
"Because if you are checking out, I am leaving." I told that crazy dude that I am NOT dying and not checking out--just another Mr. Sensitivity comment. I did have to laugh tho'...he is sooo not good with drama like death.

PK brought me a perfect book that I haven't started reading yet called "How to Live Between Office Visits". I swear to god that having this time away to just live is extremely scary. I figure if I am in the doctor's office I am not dead or dying, and if I was they would save me, but since I don't see the doctor for three weeks--egads...just think what could go wrong! That is why the book will be perfect. Pk, i admire your knowledge and appreciate all that you have done.

It was great to see co-workers and I luckily ran into Susan, a breast cancer survivor. When she was diagnosed long before I was I admired her so much for her bravery and her commitment to teaching. I still do admire her and she is, I am happy to say, cancer free! She sees my friend Dr. Ansari too, another reason to feel I am in good hands.

I also had someone post to the Rare Cancer Forum who is an ACC/breast survivor. She said she was going to read my blog. I can't tell you how happy that made me. This disease is so isolating and to know that there is someone else out there that I can talk made me giddy today! Her name is Kristina and I hope she comments so we can all pick her brain when needed. I also am emailing a newly diagnosed person name Valerie. For this being rare, there sure seems to be too many of us. But thank god for the internet.

Tonight my favorite ex-boss made us the best dinner. She said she didn't want me cooking on my first day back to work. (She was right--I was very tired) I have to get the recipe--it was chicken and stuffing, complimented with almond green beens, a sherbet salad and zuchinni bread. THEN, Lynn brought over this amazing looking fruit basket of cut fruit that looked just like flowers. This was from her and Jami and I can say I think I have eaten almost all the watermelon already! Like I said, I am amazed at all of you. And Heather, thanks for the mug. I will put my chai tea in it. (by the way Heather, why haven't you commented??)

Andrew is home and happy to be home. The last night in Maine all the teams got together and traded things--mainly t-shirts and hats. He came home with three hats--one from Hawaii, Venezeula, and Canada--plus, three t-shirts. He sent Michigan and Niles stuff all over the world. He is grumpy about having to miss two games for football but said he wouldn't have done anything differently. I am glad to have him home.

Lonnie, you should see me trying to use this IPod. Josh thought he would give me some good walking music so so far all Ican get is some Nelly...when he gets home tonight I will need a quick lesson! Everything is downloaded and not a minute too soon since the worries are never far behind...

Still coughing a little bit, but salivary glands aren't worrying me as much. Off to a board meeting--first of the year.

Love to you all!

Molly

6 comments:

lori brawley said...

Hi Molly- from Connor.
P.S. He liked the pictures!!

PK said...

I'm having an intervention with Robert this week.....may prepare for him a list of "Supportive Comments for Serious Situations That Robert May Use"
You looked wonderful & "up" today...did my soul good to see you so.

PK

Betty said...

Mol, Gotta love that crazy dude, Robert. I can hear your conversation with him:) He said he'd leave when I left too (that was 3 years ago) Good thing you know he loves you dearly! NHS wouldn't be the same without the two of you.

Good to learn the update on Susan
(a true warrior and an inspiration to others). Look forward to Kristina's comments on your blog. I've learned so much about "we women" from reading your and others' words. And someday, my friend, you will look back on this time in you life as a period of learning, growing, and discovering the depths of your own strength.

As for the recipe (you'll get it). You know my 2 recipe requirements: First - It's easy, Second - It's tasty.

Drew downloaded my MP3 player. I use it out walking. So...with your new IPod & my MP3, we'd be set if you ever want to walk and commune with nature.

Much love

DADS said...

oh my gosh, I am blogging! a new one for me! Molly, I love your comments, your humor and honesty. We are all praying for you, let me know when you want cheese cake! Lots of hugs and kisses, the DADS

Betty said...

Hey Bloggers, Talked with Molly this a.m. We discussed my setting up a somewhat organized dinner schedule for the Brawley bunch to begin after Sept. 7 (Mol's surgery date). Several of you have inquired. This retiree would love coordinating it so the family isn't eating only chicken or lasagna and nothing else.

Homemade,or ordered and brought in, a partial meal - say salad, or dessert, an entree, whatever. I know that we can feed Molly and her brood and probably get some great ideas for menus in our homes too.

Molly says that they won't need every night,(boys schedule remains busy, etc.),that Jim is a pretty good cook, and they do have leftovers sometimes - rare, I bet with two teenagers!

Anyway, I am including my e-mail address (betty.perkins@hotmail.com)
If you'd like to participate in the Brawley Food Force, you'll be a BFF (best friend forever)---- just e-mail me or call me at 684-2053 to say what date works for you and, if you can, a general description of what you're taking.

Let me know if this works for you or if you have suggestions on how best to work this out together.

Thanks a bunch.

kristina said...

Hello Molly,
Love your blog!!! It feel as though I am reading about myself.. Everything from this is one of the rarest cancers ever and even though I live in the tristate area,Northern New Jersey and am being treated at an excellent progressive cancer center at Morristown Memorial Hospital none of my doctors have ever had experience with this before. I was fortunate they diagnosed it correctly on the first shot. January 19, 2007 was the day my whole life changed. I love some of the titles of your blogs. Cancer sucks is the best because that is how I felt most days. Also it is amazing how you can have cancer and life just goes on. I still cant believe the summer is almost over and I am back to work.

I had two lumpectomies to achieve clear margins with a sentinel node biopsy. The blue dye still not completely out of my system marks its territory on my left breast with a large bruise-like mark. Then five weeks of tiring radiation five days a week. It is all over now and I am clean. I had my followup six month mammogram and ultrasound and will be having a followup bilateral breast MRI next month. It gets better so hang in there. I love reading your blog and look forward to it. I will also email you at the address you left on the tumor boards.

So glad to have a sister survivor.
Kristina